April's Flowers and May Showers
by I hart Booth
Summary: Sequel to April Ain't Nobody's Fool. April deals with her pain in the best way she knows how, and Booth and Brennan are left to make sense of the rubble. Definite BB.
1. Skin Deep

**_Here is the sequel, sorry it took so long to post, i hope I won't let it become a habit. Um...this was supposed to be a fuffier sequel to the Angst Train before it...but...it kind of went in it's own direction. I think you'll see what I mean about halfway through..._**

**---**

**Life is good. Funny, I never thought that expression would be applicable to MY life…okay not 'haha' funny…more ironic I guess….not that that matters in any way whatsoever.**

**---**

Brennan took a deep breath as she entered Dulles airport, glad to finally be breathing air that hadn't been re-circulated twelve times and inside the lungs of a man whom she was pretty sure had Influenza.

She brushed her bangs out of her face and began scanning the crowd for Booth's tall, handsome figure. She'd been waist deep in human remains for the past three weeks and the only bones she wanted to be jumping right then, were his.

Finally through the mass of people and luggage, she spotted a familiar face. Not the one she was searching for, but it would do.

"April!" Brennan quickened her pace and waved, pulling a large rolling black suitcase behind her.

The girl met her eyes and smiled shyly, waving back but not moving from her spot in the middle of the airport terminal.

"Hi." April waited while Brennan limped toward her, weeks spent on her feel finally catching up to the young anthropologist.

"Where's Booth?" She asked, pausing in front of her and leaning on her one rolling suitcase.

April smiled that small smile again and shrugged. She wore an off the shoulder long sleeved black top and a poofy turquoise skirt that went to her knees. A pair of black and white stripped knee socks and black boots finished off the girls' odd outfit.

Brennan could tell the skirt had been Angela's idea, the artist had been trying to bring 'a little color' into April's wardrobe ever since she met her, also evidenced by a pair of loud green and blue sequin earrings.

"He had to work late, he's really sorry he couldn't make it though Dr. B, you'll just have to make due with me." April reached up to tuck her now naturally colored dark-brown hair behind her ear, even though it wasn't necessary. Ever since Booth started calling her 'Angle-face' she'd been wearing her hair in a low ponytail at the base of her head.

Brennan smiled and reached forward to hug her gently. When she'd left, April's bruises and scars had still been visible and causing her pain, the events of just three weeks before and her kidnapping still fresh on everyone's minds.

Brennan was glad to see that April's wrist brace was now gone and the bruises on her face had completely healed.

"To be honest, I'd much rather see you than Booth." She teased.

"Now Bones, that's not true and you know it."

Brennan jumped at the voice in her ear and turned, smacking Booth in the rips with her bag.

"Booth!" She glared at him and then at April, who was laughing out loud.

"That's not funny." She told them, hands on her hips as Booth gave her a pained smile.

"Sure it is Bones." He stepped toward her, slowly in case she decided to beat him with her purse again. But Brennan remained still, her eyes traveling over his body, dressed in a casual t-shirt and jeans just the way she liked, her anger all but forgotten. She was much to concerned with her desire to kiss him to be angry.

Booth's eyes flashed with amusement at how easily he got to her. It was obvious in her face, at least to him, that the whole world had fallen away and only one thing was running through her mind.

_Glad I'm not alone in that department._ He grinned devilishly and pulled her to him. Immediately her hands were around his neck, his hands on her hips, alone and lost in each other. Neither was sure exactly who kissed who, but the effect was immediate and electric.

April rolled her eyes but couldn't help grinning, glad the light seemed to be back in Booth's eyes. He'd tried to play it off, but it was obvious even to her that he missed his Bones. More than he liked to admit.

After a few moments April sighed loudly and stepped toward them, snapping her fingers.

"Okay guys, time out with the Tonsil Hockey. As if I'm not scarred enough as it is." She grumbled when they jumped apart, red-faced and gasping. She moved around them to get to Brennan's luggage when Booth grabbed her waist and began tickling her.

"What? I can't say 'Hi' to my girlfriend."

April squealed and attempted to wriggle out of his grip, but he had a firm hold on her. Laughing loudly she replied.

"Say 'Hi' , yes. Attempt to remove her lugs through her throat, no." She giggled. "Seeley quit it…Seriously!…HELP!!"

Brennan, who'd been watching the madness from a safe distance, stepped toward them and grasped one of April's arms with her right hand and pushed on Booth's chest with her left.

"Booth, let the poor girl breathe." She reprimanded, pulling April away from him.

"Yeah, let the poor girl breathe Seeley." April gasped from her spot at Brennan's side and grinned at Booth, who childishly stuck his tongue out at the two of them.

In all the commotion April's sleeve had ridden up and Brennan caught sight of a white bandage peeking out from beneath her shirt.

"April, what happened?" Brennan took hold of the girl's wrist and looked closer.

April grew tense and pulled her hand back to her chest, her mood suddenly solemn.

"Nothing Dr. B, I'll…"

"I told you, April, you can call me Tempe. I practically live with you two anyway." Brennan corrected gently, her hand still on April's upper arm.

April nodded, staring at the shiny airport floor.

"Sorry. Tempe. I'll, um, meet you guys at the car." With that she turned and clomped her heavy boots toward the glass doors.

Brennan turned to Booth.

"Booth, what is that? What's wrong with her wrists?" Her face was wrinkled with a concerned frown, upset that something had happened to April while she was gone. But her concern grew to curiosity when Booth suddenly began avoiding her eyes.

"Let's talk about it later okay Bones?" He asked, reaching for her suitcase with one hand and trying to lace their fingers with the other.

Brennan wasn't too keen on being blown off and moved to stand in front of him.

"No. I want to know now. What happened to April's wrist, Booth?"

He sighed, finally meeting her burning blue gaze and he licked his lips.

"Do you know what 'cutting' is Bones?"

Brennan drew her eyebrows together, about to answer literally when a light bulb went on in her head. Her eyes widened and furrowed her brows, instinctively stepping toward him.

"No." She whispered.

Booth nodded and sighed again Brennan noticing for the first time how tired he looked.

"I caught her in the bathroom yesterday with a razor blade. Took her to the emergency room…we were there all night." His tone had lost all playfulness as the gravity of the situation hit him full force. He draped one arm over Brennan's shoulders and they fell into step on the way to the car. "She won't talk about it."

Brennan nodded, her head resting on his shoulder. She swallowed the anxiety welling up in her stomach.

She'd wanted so badly to believe April would be alright now, that living in a loving home where she was safe would somehow cure her. Make her forget all she'd been through.

But the rational scientist in her knew it wasn't possible.

"What do we do now?" Brennan asked quietly as they walked out into the hot midday sun.

Booth took a deep breath and squeezed her shoulders, preparing her for what he was about to say next.

"I've been thinking of calling Gordon Gordon. He owes me a favor, maybe he could talk to her…help her. I don't really know what else to do."

He felt Brennan tense beside him but waited patiently for her to say something.

Brennan bit her lip and pulled her sunglasses down over her eyes, struck by the helplessness in his voice. She knew he was as clueless as she when it came to parenting teenage girls, in actuality she held a bit of an advantage having spent some time as a teenage girl. A damaged one like April even.

Somehow that made it a little easier to offer her input on the matter.

"I hate psychology, but…" she looked up and saw the girl in question leaning against the back of Booth's SUV, her head turned upward, bathing her pale face in the warmth of the sun.

"A suppose a soft science is better than nothing."

Booth nodded and turned to kiss her temple.

"My thinking exactly."

She smiled at him as they approached the SUV.

"Why does Gordon Gordon owe you a favor anyway?"

He grinned and hit his remote to unlock the car and April immediately climbed inside.

"You remember that Gazebo in his backyard?"

"Yeah." She nodded, the small building behind the psychologists' house was well built and elegant. It certainly left an impression. "What about it?"

He heaved her suitcase into the trunk and flashed her the Charm Smile. "All moi."

She raised an eyebrow.

"You built that Gazebo?"

He only nodded, stepping toward her again and dipping his head to kiss her.

"Don't sound so surprised Bones. You didn't think these magic fingers only worked on you did ya'?"

She tipped her head up and mirrored his lustful look back at him.

"Oh, I'm quite aware they're good for other…things too." She whispered, pulling him down in to another deep kiss.

A loud groan broke the moment.

"Ugh! Guys please! Could you stop with the spit swapping already? You're grossing me out!"

Booth pulled away laughing and rolled his eyes.

"If us kissing grosses you out maybe you should stay at Angela's tonight because we're going to be doing a lot more than…"

April clapped her hands over her ears and shut her eyes.

"La la la. I can't hear you. La la la-dee da da da!"

**---**

**I have a feeling they were just talking about me. They're worried. I don't see why. Once screwed up, always screwed up.**

**Life is still pretty good though, if you asked me.**

**---**

**_Now work YOUR magic fingers and press that beautiful button!! _**


	2. In the Family

**_Okay, you guys knew the angst train would be steaming down the tracks for this fic too didn't you? Well...there is fluff around the bend...but there's a long stretch of track before there...ALL ABOARD!_**

---

**I wish it could be easy all the time. **

**---**

The car ride was mostly silent on the half hour drive back to town. Brennan had switched on the radio and was exchanging warm glances with Booth every so often, their hands laced between them.

April sat behind absently coloring her nails black with a marker, rolling her eyes at the adults' mushy expressions, though she couldn't help the smile on her lips.

"So how have the cases been? You like working with Zack?"

Booth snorted. "Oh yeah, we're best pals."

Brennan raised an eyebrow and turned to April in the backseat.

"Was that sarcasm?" Then, turning to Booth, "I think that was sarcasm." She and April both grinned.

"You know Seeley, sarcasm in the workplace can be highly stressful." April said in a matter-of-fact tone she'd learned from listening to Brennan talk.

Booth groaned.

"If you guys are going to gang up on me you're not going to be allowed to play with each other any more."

The girls giggled and Booth turned onto a familiar street.

"We're getting Parker?" Brennan asked curiously.

"I hope you don't mind, he was really excited when he heard you were coming back today."

Brennan flipped open the visor mirror and checked her appearance.

"Yeah that's fine." She said, adding a quick swipe of lipstick.

Booth chuckled.

"Getting all dolled up for my son Bones? I think he may be a bit young for you."

Brennan huffed. "No, I'm not getting "dolled up" for Parker. I've been told that women without make-up tend to frighten children and small animals." She said in all seriousness, proper air-quotes in place.

April was set to laughing out loud at this but Booth only turned a warm smile on her as he pulled up in front of the house. Reaching over, he took her chin between his thumb and forefinger and pulled her to him.

"Let me tell you Babe, those rules don't apply to you." He kissed her gently. "You look beautiful all the time."

April saw them leaning in for another, deeper kiss, and decided to give them a break. As quietly as she could she sipped from the car and ran toward the house.

Booth's seatbelt quickly became a hindrance and Brennan leaned over, undoing both his and hers in a single motion.

He felt a twinge of embarrassment getting hot and heavy with his girlfriend while sitting in front of his son's house, but quickly got over it when Brennan began making those little noises that drove him wild. She tipped her head back and to the side, making it easier for Booth to get to the sensitive skin on her neck and closed her eyes. She moaned when he began to nip it lightly and moved her hand higher on his thigh, causing Booth's discomfort to grow…literally.

His hands worked their way under her shirt and touched her spine gently, sending tingles of anticipation racing across her skin. When she reached for the button on his pants, his brain was suddenly jumped started and one of his hands disentangled itself from her hair and caught her wrist.

"Later Temperance." He rasped. "We have continue this…later."

She rested her forehead against his, knowing he was right. She nodded.

"Okay. But remember…I don't like to wait." She quickly smoothed her hair and joined him outside the car.

He only grinned as he took her hand and started up the pathway toward the door.

Rebecca flung the door open before Booth even had a chance to knock.

"Seeley, Temperance, come on in." She smiled, stepping aside so they could enter the house.

Brennan followed Booth inside, grateful that the tentatively polite relationship the trio had developed had not grown awkward in her absence. It _had_ been six weeks afterall.

"April just ran upstairs with Parker, do you want coffee or anything?"

Booth shook his head. "No thanks, we'll just grab Parker and head out. We're going on a picnic."

Brennan raised her eyebrows but remained silent and Rebecca shrugged, returning to the kitchen.

"Well you know the way. Seeley, try and have him back by six okay?"

Booth agreed and lead the way upstairs.

"Now c'mon Parker, you know the Power Rangers and the X-men can't be on the same team!" April's soft voice worked it's way around the corner and Booth smiled, he could tell she was playing with his son, probably more engrossed in the game than he was.

"Yes-huh! They can so, they gotta work all together so dey catch the bad guys!"

"Parker…The Incredible Hulk is NOT a bad guy. He's just…misunderstood."

The adults slowly poked their heads around the doorframe and watched the kids inside.

Parker sat kneeling on the floor, reaching into a big purple bag of action figures and talking animatedly with April about who was, and was not the bad guy. April sat next to him, cross-legged on the floor and carefully setting up a scene with the little men that had already been chosen.

"Oh No! Parker look!"

Booth watched his son whip his head out of the bag at the sound of April's cry, just in time to see Magneto carry a wounded Storm away to the Bat-mobile.

"We gotta save 'er!" Parker said, worry and determination in his tone.

_Sounds just like his father._ Brennan noted. _I guess the orange doesn't fall far from the tree._

Brennan furrowed her brow in concentration as Parker grabbed a small plastic man, whom Booth would have told her was named RoboCop, and sent him flying into the other two figurines while making a loud explosion noise with his mouth.

She leaned up to whisper in Booth's ear. "Why are those ones wearing pajamas."

She pointed to a few abandoned figures in the middle of the room, Booth grinned.

"Those are the Power Rangers, Bones. That's their uniforms."

Her frown deepened. "How are they supposed to be taken seriously by criminals if they dress like that?"

Booth laughed out loud and caught the attention of the kids.

"Daddy! Dr. Bones!" Parker launched himself across the room and after a moment's hesitation, Brennan crouched down and met his hug, the force of which sent her flying backwards on her butt.

"Parker be gentle." Booth reprimanded.

Parker immediately began talking a mile a minute and as usual Brennan was thoroughly engrossed in what he was saying, trying to catch every muddled word.

Booth watched the concentrated dent between her eyebrows warmly and grinned at the way she flinched every time Parker made one of his wide, enthusiastic gestures. Slowly the pair rose and walked downstairs, assuming Booth and April were right behind.

April quietly threw the rest of Parker's toys back in the bag and shoved it under his bed before joining Booth at the door.

"Hey Angel-face."

April flicked her eyes toward him but immediately turned away.

"Hi."

Sensing her mood was not as light as she made it out to be, he dipped his head to look at her again.

"You okay?"

She sighed and crossed her arms over her chest, making her small frame even more compact beside him.

"Did you…did you tell her?" She asked, apprehension reflected in her tone and face, a lock of dark hair falling down the middle of her forhead and into her eyes.

Booth swallowed and nodded. "Yes…She's a part of your life now April. She has the right to know."

Clenching her teeth, April visibly fought to calm herself.

"Fine. Let's go." She started down the stairs ahead of him and Booth eyed her back for a moment before following.

Bidding farewell to Rebecca, he exited the house to find April striding purposefully down the walkway toward his SUV.

"April, hold on a second." He called out. Brennan looked up as she shut the back door after buckling Parker in but decided to let Booth handle the situation and got into the car.

April whirled around, long hair hitting her in the face, dark eyes flashing with white hot rage he'd rarely seen.

"You had _no_ right Seeley! Some things are private!" She her scream shook with emotion causing both occupants in the car to turn and look out tinted windows.

Booth stepped toward her calmly, doing his best to keep his body neutral, not wanting to scare her off or make her shut down to him.

"It is private. It's staying within the family. For now."

Her hands remained in tight fists, arms straight at her sides. "What do you mean 'for now'?"

Booth took a deep breath, careful to keep his voice low.

"I mean, that when you are doing things to hurt yourself, your safety takes precedence over your privacy."

April's eyes widened in horror.

"Don't. Seeley Booth if you say word one to anyone about this…"

"April I'll do what I have to. I'm not letting anything happen to you." He held her gaze steadily and reached out to push some of her loose hair behind her ear.

Something sad and dark fell across the girl's face and she looked at the ground for a moment before bringing her gaze back to his.

"Too late Seeley. The damage has already been done." She whispered in that calm voice that always sent shivers down his back. She pulled out of his reach and practically ran the rest of the way to the car.

Booth remained still, searching for a handle on the moment. His gaze caught Brennan's and held it, hoping they were strong enough to teach this girl how to love again.

**---**

**Maybe it would be easy if I wasn't so damn afraid. Afraid of the dark. Afraid of heights. Of spiders and dogs. Afraid of being hurt, of being alone…afraid they'll grow tired of me and throw me away, just like everyone else. **

**---**

**_I know, already it's angsty...well...it's kind of my thing. lol. Press the button and make me happy and I'll try to do the same! _**


	3. Under the Old Oak Tree

**_Okay,_so I am sure you are all wondering what happened to me. (as if you have nothing better to do with your lives than wonder why I"m not updating. lol) And the answer is, no I didn't fall off the face of the earth or get attacked by Big Foot. My computer died and...well, that's pretty much it. That put a major damper on things. So I'm at work now, shhh. Don't tell my boss. **

---

**Watching Seeley with her simultaneously sends electric happiness and blinding depression coursing through me. No one deserves to have their soul mate by their side more than him.**

**It just makes me miss my own.**

---

"So how were things in El Salvador?" Booth asked casually, as he and Brennan lay on the picnic blanket in the comfortable shade of an old Oak tree.

Brennan moved her book so she could see his head in her lap.

"Oh, It was great Booth. Drinking and late nights out dancing with my fellow travelers, next time you should come." Without a hint of teasing in her voice, she went back to reading.

Booth frowned and reached up to push the book aside and she matched him, raised eyebrow for raised eyebrow.

"Well? What do you expect? I spent the last three week sifting through human remains, it wasn't exactly a fun-filled time away."

He smiled. "True. But, you did relax a bit didn't you?" At her blank stare he continued. "You know…see the nightlife?"

He gave her a hopeful look, he already hated the thought of her being so far away, the fact that she probably spent the entire time working without a moments rest didn't help any.

Brennan smiled. "Booth, the nightlife in the area where I was staying consisted of grown men snoring two tents over and the mating calls of the Tortoise Beetle."

Booth rolled his eyes and started to go back to his crossword puzzle when Brennan suddenly touched his cheek and turned him back toward her.

"I did miss you though." She said quietly, leaning down to kiss him.

"Did you really?" He smiled up at her when she pulled back a moment later, a dangerous glint in his eyes. He put his hand to the back of her head and leaned up to meet her for another kiss.

"Terribly?" He murmured against her lips.

"Dreadfully." She answered back, keeping the kisses light and teasing so as to not earn glares from the other families in the park. Booth seemed to sense her discomfort and released her with a sigh.

"I love my son, Bones, but right now," He stroked his thumb across her cheek as he spoke. Her auburn hair was glowing from the sun filtering through the trees and how gorgeous she looked was enough to drive him insane. "I'm wishing dinnertime could be a little earlier. All I want is to be alone with you."

With laughing eyes she pulled away and went back to her reading.

"I'm told patience is a virtue." She said nonchalantly, holding the book so he couldn't see her smile. Booth pretended not to notice and pulled his crossword puzzle back onto his chest.

"Good thing I'm not a saint then." He said quietly crossing his legs at the ankles, studying his puzzle once more. After a moment her voice quietly drifted to his ear.

"Yes, very good thing."

He shut his eyes and suppressed a groan.

There was nothing sexual about what she said, but the innuendo was there. And she said it in that sweet, husky voice she used only with him. And she wore that expression, Booth was sure, where her eyes were on fire and her lips parted just enough to make him want to kiss her breath away . Her legs twitched beneath him and the muscles in her thighs tightened.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly..

A dozen little things she did left him with one big problem, and attempting to conjure up images of Goodman in a dress.

_God Bones, that's just not fair._

**There you go. A bit of BB lovin with which for me to grovel. I'm going to post two more chaps before I leave today, again, sorry for the delay! **


	4. Lucky Girl

**Ok, so this is the next chap, still groveling for your forgivness with chaps...I know, low...but since I can't actually send you money or a lifesize cardboard cutout of DB, this will have to do.**

---

**There's nobody else like him. Nobody. My friends used to ask why I love Tommy Hopkins. I just smile and say…because.**

---

April and Brennan waited in the stuffy SUV while Booth took Parker inside. Most of the afternoon had been tense, with April and Booth avoiding eye contact and conversation with one another.

That is, until Parker decided he needed just one more ride on the swings and Booth hesitated because he'd yet to spend any time with Brennan. April offered to take him and smiled at Booth for the first time, her form of an apology.

"Thanks Angel-face." He grinned, snatching up his crossword and Brennan's book before leaning over and kissing his goddaughter on the forehead quickly.

April only shrugged. "Just try to keep it PG okay? There are kids and families around here." And she'd walked off, leaving the pair alone under the Oak tree.

Now April sat in the back seat of Booth's SUV in an awkward silence with Brennan. She was blowing hot breath on the window and drawing faces in the fog it made when the scientist suddenly turned around to speak to her.

"So, how did things go while I was gone?" She asked, readjusting her seatbelt so it didn't cut into her clavicle.

April looked over from where she'd been staring out the window.

"Fine I guess…" a small secretive smile graced her pale lips, "I think Seeley's fingers hurt."

Brennan frowned. "Why?"

"Because he had to dial for take-out almost every night. The fingers aren't made for that kind of abuse." She smiled, her green eyes sparkling in the evening sun.

Brennan's frown deepened. "I told him to make you real food." She grumbled, turning back around to face the front and flicking on the air conditioning.

"I don't mind." April shrugged, looking out the window again. "He's been busy with this big case…I like take-out." She bit her lip, worried she'd said something wrong. Well, judging by the shade of red Brennan's ears were turning, she'd _definitely_ said something wrong.

"Yes but in order for your body to heal correctly you need proper nutrients and you don't get that from take-out." Brennan said without thinking, glaring in the direction of the house where Booth was emerging through the big red door.

April's face darkened and she turned to look back out the window. She was still sensitve to references to her jaded past. Rodger's face and the bone chilling fear she'd felt ever moment of being with him was still fresh, and she hated it. It was in the past, that was where it belonged. She didn't want any of it to be a part of what she was now.

What she didn't realize was that everything leading up to that point made her who she was now.

"I'm fine." April mumbled, just as Booth opened the door and climbed inside. Brennan glanced at her but remained silent.

"Okay, Angela knows you're coming over Bug, apparently she's got a whole 'girl's night' planned. Sounds debilitating boring but…"

"Did you make any real food for April while I was gone?" Brennan turned toward him suddenly, her arms folded across her chest.

Booth stopped and drew his eyebrows together, throwing a sidelong glance at the woman next to him, he could feel her icy glare boring into his temple.

"Yeah, a couple times." When he received no response he continued. "But Bones, I mean there was this case and…"

"Booth I told you, in order for her body to heal properly…"

April cut off the fight before it could get going.

"Um…hello? Mind waiting until I'm gone to duke it out over who was more right or wrong about me?" She waved her hand between them. "I'm right here and I'm fine. Take-out never killed anybody okay? Just drop it, there's nothing you can do about it now."

Booth and Brennan glanced back at her and then at each other, a silent truce passing between them.

April sighed. "Just give Tommy Angela's number when he calls, okay Seeley."

Brennan perked up at mention of the boy's name.

"How is Tommy doing?"

When she'd left Tommy had only been out of the hospital for two weeks and on bed rest at home. He should have been fully recovered by now.

April bit her lip and looked away and Booth stiffened, a change that did not go unnoticed by Brennan.

"Did I miss something?"

"Tommy was sent to military school a week and a half ago." Booth answered quietly, stealing a glance at the girl in the backseat.

Brennan drew her eyebrows together. "Why?"

"Because of me." April answered quickly.

"April…"

"Save it Seeley. You and I both know it's true. Tommy's parents don't want their precious boy to risk Harvard for some foster home reject so they sent him away." She said harshly, glaring at his rearview mirror.

"April you're not…"

"Whatever." She sat back and sighed, tracing imaginary shapes on the window.

"You know," she said after a few moments of silence, "Tommy doesn't even want to be a lawyer. He thinks lawyers are sleazy. He should know, both his parents are attorneys."

Brennan winced at the venom in the girl's words and Booth's grip tightened on the steering wheel. She understood April's hostility, the Hopkins had never been exactly warm toward the girl, and now they'd taken away one of the few people she'd learned to trust.

Brennan wished she knew something encouraging to say to her, one of those fake little things people were always saying to each other that didn't really mean anything, but seemed to help none-the-less.

"You know what he wants to be?" April's disturbingly calm voice interrupted her thoughts. Brennan shook her head.

"A doctor." April bit her lip, but her eyes gave away a teary-eyed smile. "He wants to find a cure for cancer. He says if he does, he'll name it after my mom."

April hastily swiped a hand across her eyes and looked away again, this time with a peaceful smile on her face.

Booth glanced at Brennan, who returned his smile and he reached for her hand.

"You're a lucky girl April." Brennan said quietly, noting that she had never ascribed anything to luck before meeting Booth, and it didn't bother her near as much as it probably should have.

April only nodded, but the spark in her eyes spoke volumes.

---

**That's why I love him. Because.**

---


	5. Homecoming

**So this shall be the last of my redemption chaps for today I think. Hope it's to your liking.**

**---**

**He's overprotective as hell. But it doesn't really bug me. It's his way of showing he cares, who am I to stop him?**

**---**

They waited as April ran inside to pack a few things for school the next day and Booth turned to his partner, entwining their hands subtly.

"It's going to be good to have you back. Zack was driving me nuts." He muttered, even while a small smile graced his lips.

"Really? Because I was thinking of taking another week off to get some work done on my novel."

Booth's eyes slid over to hers, about to protest, but he sighed in relief. Her teasing smile gave her away.

"That's not funny."

Bennnan laughed quietly. "Why so serious Booth? Zack's a good forensic anthropologist."

Booth nodded. "I know. But he's…severely lacking in people skills."

"So am I. You can teach him."

"No, I can't." He stated.

"Why not? You taught me."

"That's different, Bones, it's…"

"How?"

Booth sighed. She wasn't even home for a day and he already wanted to pull his hair out.

_God, I missed her._

Before he could answer the backdoor opened and April climbed in.

"Okay, all set."

Booth pulled away from the curb, glancing in the rear view mirror as he spoke.

"Toothbrush, toothpaste, socks and hair stuff?"

"Check check, check and check. And before you ask, 'yes' I have clean underwear and socks. I know how to pack my bags Seeley." She teased. He often babied her, especially if she was staying over somewhere which, granted, wasn't very often. It was annoying, but comforting. No one had ever cared to ask those things before.

Brennan watched with interest as the two interacted and felt a pang of jealousy at how much closer they seemed to have gotten in her absence. She shifted in her seat as she listened to them banter, wishing she hadn't had to leave right when she and April were getting close, the kind of close she'd always wanted with her mother.

Almost immediately she banished the thought, a twinge of panic touching the outskirts of her mind.

_I'm not her mother._

Booth smiled. "Well, tell me you packed something besides black, Bug."

April sighed dramatically. "Of course I did Seeley…my socks have red stripes." She grinned and jumped out of the car as they pulled up in front of Angela's apartment.

Angela had just pulled up as well and was on her way to her door, arms loaded down with bags from Macy's.

"Hey you two!" She dropped her items and rounded the car to where Brennan was climbing out of the SUV.

Brennan stumbled backward at the rough hug from her friend but grinned none-the-less.

"Hey Ange."

The brunette pulled away and entwined their arms as they slowly rounded the car and Angela bombarded her with questions.

"Sweetie, how are you? How was the trip? How was the dig? Was it horrible, was it disgusting? Are you just ecstatic to be back?" They paused and found April and Booth standing at the front door, Booth's arms full of the bags Angela had dropped.

"Okay, he is just too sweet. If I wasn't an engaged woman we would _so_ be fighting over him."

Brennan only grinned while her gaze traveled over her muscular boyfriend, who'd somehow located Angela's hide-a-key and had strode inside the apartment, brown-haired April in tow.

"Yeah, we would…and I would have to kick your butt." She grinned over at her friend and Angela's mouth dropped.

"That's my girl!"

---

**Gotta love her. Bold style, take-no-prisoners attitude and a helluva artist. I want to _be_ her.**

---

Booth and Brennan made it back to his apartment in record time. Not only had they been away from each other for three weeks, meaning they were three weeks behind in a very new relationship, but Angela managed to supply them with enough sexual innuendoes that Booth was resisting the urge to put on the siren.

"Bones." He ground out, accelerating through a yellow light. "Hand, Bones."

Brennan glanced down to find her hand working it's way up his thigh to a very sensitive area.

"You know, if you let me drive we wouldn't be having this problem." She muttered, only moving her hand a few inches.

Booth grinned. "Oh yes. We would."

They made it two more miles in tense silence before Brennan felt like she was about to explode.

"Pull over."

"Way ahead of you."

A black SUV quickly exited the freeway and made it's way to a very secluded spot at the far end of an empty parking lot.

---

**I hate these pajamas.**

---

"Okay, those are the cutest pajamas ever." Angela nodded approvingly as April emerged from the guest bedroom in a dark purple tank top and shorts with little green aliens all over them.

"Angela, you bought me these." April tugged at the fabric nervously and smoothed a few imaginary wrinkles.

"Ahh…that must be why I like them so much." She shrugged and bounded down the hallway to grasp April's hand, carefully avoiding the still bandaged wrists which she had been filled in on, and drug her back out to the living room.

"I rented all the best chick flicks, we have 'An Affair to Remember' classic. 'Fried Green Tomatoes', heartbreaking, and 'Finding Neverland', just because Johnny Depp is hot." She sat down cross-legged on the Persian rug and leaned back against her overstuffed lipstick red couch, indicating for April too do the same.

Brennan and Booth did finally make it back to his apartment, several broken speed limits and one more unscheduled stop later. They even made it upstairs and to the bedroom without losing most of their clothes.

They did probably wake the entire building with the noise…but they definitely didn't care.

April listened half-heartedly as Angela gave the rundown of what they were going to do that night, catching every other word. Mostly she studied Angela's great apartment, a place so like what she wanted someday.

"…do hair…tons of nail polish…"

It was a studio set up, almost no walls, just one big room with high ceilings of exposed beams.

"…tissues…popcorn…vanilla ice-cream…"

A couple of the walls were just brick from where the plaster had been torn down and old fashioned radiators heated the large space, keeping it nice and toasty.

"…chocolate chip…such a hottie…"

Hardwood floors, flashy, eclectic furniture and huge windows. If there was ever a place April could feel at home, this was it.

"…midnight painting session..."

April's head snapped over in Angela's direction.

"Really?" Her eyes wide at the prospect of using some of Angela's beautiful art supplies.

"Yeah, I even got you your very own set, see?" From beneath the couch the artist produced a sturdy looking mahogany box. She opened it to reveal a perfect set of painters' brushes and at least a dozen tubes of the finest acrylic paint.

April was speechless and frozen for a moment. Finally, one hand on her chest, the other slowly reached out and touched the paintbrushes, feeling the smooth wood beneath her fingertips.

Angela dipped her chin when she saw tears shining in the girl's eyes.

"Are you okay sweetie?" Concern laced her tone as she put aside the box and took April's hand.

After a moment she looked up, her chin trembling.

"Angela…that's the nicest thing anyone's ever given me." She said quietly, "Thank you."

In seconds, Angela was also teary eyed and she nodded, unable to speak. April closed her eyes and launched herself at her, wrapping the woman in a tight hug.

"Thank you so much." She whispered.

Though she was momentarily startled, Angela immediately returned the hug, smiling broadly at the unexpected show of affection.

April pulled back and wiped her eyes.

"Can we paint now?" She asked shyly.

"Do Irish Accents make hot guys even hotter?" Angela grabbed April's hand, April grabbed her paint box and they scampered over to the other side of the room, giggling like little girls. In no time Angela had flipped on Lynard Skynard, tossed April a green poncho and they set to work splashing paint all over the canvases against the far wall, dancing and singing loud and proud to Sweet Home Alabama.

---

**If I'd known painting was this much fun, I would have taken it up a long time ago.**

---

The next morning came and found Hodgins and Zack in the lab, bright and early, and arguing over parking spots. A few minutes later Cam strode in, nodding at the boys before immediately locking herself in her office since she wouldn't be 'awake' until at least nine.

After her came Angela, Gucci purse in one hand, large Mocha Latte in the other.

"Wow Baby, looks like the kid wore you out." Hodgins said playfully, kissing her on the lips.

"We had a late night." She told him, sipping her coffee. That was obvious, her hair was thrown into a messy bun, she wore minimal makeup and was slumped into the nearest chair she could find.

"Well, I had a late night, April fell asleep around ten. I was cleaning up until two." She explained.

"I wonder where Dr. Brennan and Agent Booth are." Zach said, staring bewildered at the empty examination table.

Angela perked up. "Hopefully they'll be late."

Hodgins caught her eye and her drift, while Zach merely squinted harder at the table.

"Zack, buddy, just because you stare at it doesn't mean a body will appear." He clapped him on the shoulder and shook his head.

Before the young man could respond, two very loud, very familiar voices rang out in the lab.

"I just don't see why I couldn't drive."

"Jeez Bones, are we going to have this argument for the rest of our lives?"

"No, only until you give me an answer."

"I gave you an answer."

"Not a good one."

"Ha! You didn't say it had to be a good…"

"Okay, do you two even _have_ normal conversations?"

Booth and Brennan stopped abruptly and looked up onto the platform where Angela stood, hands on her hips, eyebrows raised. In her black leggings, wide black belt, and white and black polka dot blouse, the artist looked like a force to be reckoned with. Especially at 7:30am.

"What are you talking about? We were having a discussion." Brennan swiped her key card and they both joined the rest on the platform.

"You were arguing." Angela retorted, noting with amusement that Booth was carrying Brennan's bag.

_I've taught you so well Sweetie._

"We were not arguing. We were talking loudly." Brennan folded her arms and Booth stood beside her, nodding his agreement.

Angela just rolled her eyes and came to stand closer to her friend.

"Sweetie, I want to know everything. How was it, what happened and did you like it?" She grinned mischievously.

Just then, Booth's cell phone rang and Brennan could tell by the way he stiffened when he answered that it was Cullen. Brennan waved off Angela's questions, obviously distracted by Booth's conversation.

"Good, I think you know and yes." She answered with disinterest as Booth hung up the phone.

"Do we have a case?" She asked eagerly, blue eyes bright with anticipation.

Booth grinned at her enthusiasm. "We have a case." He grabbed her arm and pulled her toward the stairs. "Let's go."

Angela's voice followed them out the door.

"When a girl chooses dead bodies over gossip with her friends, something's gotta be wrong!"

---

**Does knowing everyone is staring at you, but being unable to prove it, make you crazy? If it does, then I am certifiable.**

---

April kept her head down as she walked through the crowded hallways toward her locker. She often felt like a human pinball in these halls. It was very loud, very chaotic and she seemed to be in everyone's way.

Unconsciously she hugged her book closer to her and sidestepped a group of girls in stilettos before coming to a stop in front of her locker.

Just then a group of Varsity football players came careening down the hall playing catch. One of them dove to catch the out-of-control pigskin and slammed right into the lockers, squashing a thin girl dressed in black beneath him.

"Sorry, hey! Go long, Mr. Swope is comin'!"

April rubbed her shoulder after she yanked her locker open and threw an angry glare in the direction of the jocks.

She didn't notice a girl in super low rise jeans and an off the shoulder black top coming up behind her.

"Oh. My. Gawd. Apwril Wross?" A high pitched, heavily Jersey accented voice from behind made her jump and turn around.

"Yeah who wants to…Misty?"

**Soooo, who wants to know who Misty is? haha. I'm not tellin! At least, not till the next chap. Review please. **


	6. Two worlds

**_Sorry it's been so obscenely long. I'd tell you why...but you wouldn't believe me #'points accusitorily at aliens standing behind computer'#. Okay, this chap has a lot of April so I hope you guys are okay with that. Ummm...that's it. Enjoy! _**

Booth pulled the SUV as far off the freeway as he could and stopped.

"You go ahead and go to the body, I'll get your kit from the back."

"Booth I can get my own…" She paused as a semi-truck whizzed by the car and it shook fiercely in the wake of displaced air.

Booth raised his eyebrows.

"You know, just this once, I think I'll let you be the alpha male." She grinned as he squeezed her hand.

"Thank you."

"Don't thank me, thank logic."

He gave her a confused look.

"You're broader, more muscular. If you get hit by a speeding vehicle, it won't cause nearly the damage it would cause me."

"Thanks for your concern Bones." Booth said, rolling his eyes.

Booth led Brennan down into the ditch between the two lanes of highway to a small drainage pipe under the bridge. "Body was found by some highway workers doing their community service. Looks like somebody stuffed it in a bag and threw it out the car window while they were driving down the freeway." He grunted slightly and shifted the kit to his other hand, it felt like she'd packed the entire lab inside it.

"Not sure how long it's been here, but it probably got washed down with the rain."

Brennan snapped on her gloves and carefully finished unzipping the bag where a small hand had poked through.

"Did anyone touch the bag or move the body in any way?"

"No ma'am." A man in a bright orange vest answered. "I had them all step back until the cops showed up."

Brennan nodded and carefully studied the contents of the bag, which mostly included badly decomposed bodily organs and fluids, which had collected near the bottom of the duffel, and a small skeleton, huddled into the fetal position.

"Bones?"

"Female. 10-12. Possibly Asian decent…the body has been in this bag for at least two years. I can see several healed fractures as well as fresh ones that occurred closer to TOD in all her extremities." She turned to look at Booth over her shoulder. "It's possible she was beaten."

Booth's eyes darkened and his frown deepened, but her merely nodded and wrote down the rest of her preliminary analysis.

---

"Okay Bones, they know how to process a scene." Booth said, hooking her elbow and pushing her toward the SUV.

"Could have fooled me…hey! Are you trying to compromise the evidence? Get your boots away from there." Brennan pulled her arm free and started back toward the drainage pipe, where a Forensics team was attempting to keep hold on their respective tempers.

"Bones." Booth warned, this time taking her arms and spinning her back toward him. "Overzealous much? They're doing their best, and their best will be better without you breathing down their necks." He raised his eyebrows and dipped his head to peek over dark sunglasses.

I swear she misses ordering people around when she goes on these trips.

Brennan stuck out her chin, hands on her hips "Booth! This is unacceptable. Where did you find these…these…bookies?"

He smiled sweetly and gently grasped her upper arms.

"Babe," He said quietly, "Let them do their jobs. I take responsibility for any contaminated evidence, okay?"

Some of the tension left her body and she dropped her hands to her sides, but her face remained set in the same strong defiance.

"Fine. But I am holding you _personally_ responsible." She said, poking him in the chest to emphasize her point.

His face broke out into a full grin. "I look forward to it." He resisted the urge to kiss her and instead squeezed her arms and winked.

"And it's rookies, not bookies."

Brennan pursed her lips and huffed, pulling out of his grip and stalking off toward the SUV. Booth shook his head, an amused smile still on his lips as he turned toward the men and women swarming the scene.

"Hey, guys! Don't make me look bad, alright?" After quick visual confirmation that the Forensics team did, in fact, know what they were doing, then joined Brennan in the car.

"Okay, the body won't get back to the lab for about an hour…who feels like pie?"

Brennan turned slowly from the window, determined not to fall for his playful tone.

"No Booth I…" Unfortunately for her, it was nearly impossible to resist him when he smiled like that.

"Ugh. Fine." She said, rolling her eyes and trying to suppress her own smile but failing miserably.

"Pie it is."

---

**Bright pink spiky hair. Lip ring, black and white striped leggings, hot pink Pumas and a black Bon Jovi Concert tee. **

**I guess some things will never change.**

---

April blinked a few times and stared in shock at the wildly dressed girl before her. After a bit of gawking, a rarely seen smile spread across her lips.

"Misty!" She practically screamed, causing more than a few heads in the hallway to swivel in their direction. Haphazardly dropping their books, the girls embraced tightly.

"I haven't seen you in foreva' and a day. Where have you been?" Misty practically shrieked, her hands gripping April's tightly.

April just shrugged and shook her head, too excited to speak. "A lot of places."

"Oh my Gawd we have _so_ much to catch up on." She rolled her brown eyes skyward for a moment and then brought them back to April's. "Let's skip second period and find someplace to tawk."

April glanced at her abandoned Geometry book near her feet. A worn out text book with folded papers sticking out every which direction, unfinished homework and notes. Homework copied on Salmon colored paper with holes in it where she'd tried and failed to solve a problem so many times, her eraser ripped through. And notes, evidence of hours spent attempting to understand what Mr. Blackwell was explaining, even though she was pretty sure he was speaking German.

It was not a hard decision.

"Sounds good, just throw your stuff in my locker."

Misty did and soon the girls were strolling happily, arm in arm, though the thinning crowd in the hallway and making small talk. Then, moments after the tardy bell rang, their voices echoed in silence as everyone rushed off to class.

Paying no attention to their sudden solidarity, April made a comment about the preppy girls in her art class having 'the combined IQ of a Peanut' and Misty cry out with laughter, catching the attention of a security guard down the hall.

"Hey! You two, where are your passes?"

The girls glanced over their shoulders and then back at each other.

"I say we scram."

"Definitely."

Giggling, they ran to the next flight of stairs, jumped the last three steps and bounded out the door, the shouts of a heavyset security guard fading behind them. They weren't being chased anymore, but kept running anyway until they found a set of bleachers near the baseball field where they could stop and catch their breath.

---

**I love sunny mornings. The way the dew sparkles like stars at midnight, and the way the frost crunches the grass beneath my feet. I don't know, it just feels sort of…magical somehow. Like a clean slate for a new day. Like you can start over fresh. **

---

"Phew! Remind me never to run in heavy boots again!" April collapsed on the lowest level of the bleachers.

"Yeah, you're tellin' me! I almost twisted my ankle like twice." Misty exclaimed, dropping down beside her friend. They leaned back and fell into silence while they caught their breath.

"So last I heard you wah with some family one county ova'. The Dicken's place, right?"

Her face darkened. "Yeah. That's right."

Misty didn't notice her stiffened posture and continued smoothly. "How were they?"

April sat forward and pulled on a tall weed between her feet.

"I don't wanna talk about it." She mumbled.

Misty opened her eyes and sat forward, studying April carefully for a few moments before she spoke.

"Oh." She nodded and looked away, tugging on a lock of pink hair. "Mike Tyson or Hugh Heffna'?"

The corner of April's lips curled for a moment, she liked Misty's clever way of approaching a scary, very private subject.

"Mike Tyson."

Misty didn't even flinch, only nodded knowingly. "That sucks."

April thought about telling her friend that what really sucked was being kidnapped and almost blown up, but decided against it.

After a moment Misty reached behind her into a silver-sequined purse and retrieved a small cardboard box. Taking a cigarette between her lips, she offered the box to April.

"Na, I quit."

Misty's eyebrows shot up and she carefully lit her cig, taking a long drag before exhaling to respond.

"You did? When did this happen?"

April shrugged and brushed her bangs off her forehead.

"Tommy said he didn't like the taste." She saw Misty's jaw drop in the corner of her eye and smiled.

"You and Tommy Hopkins?" Misty asked, blowing a puff of smoke skyward. "Wow, is that ever a blast from the past." She shook her head with a smile and kicked the dirt in front of their seats.

"I always knew you two was perfect for each otha'."

April nodded. "Yup, you always did."

---

**It really is stupid how long it took us to get together. We danced around and around for so long it's actually sad. Flirted the way children do, water fights, passing notes, the whole nine yards. It was nice then, pretending. It was sort of like playing house or being in a soap opera. Nothing was serious, feelings weren't really involved, 'going out' meant holding hands at recess. **

**Then we grew up. I think it literally happened in one night. I met his parents, who found out I didn't have any, and therefore, Tommy wasn't to have anything to do with me. **

**Later that night, I snuck over to his house after finding out the worst possible news I could have heard. He held me while I cried. I think that's when it happened, that's the exact moment we grew up. When he gave me my first kiss, and it was nothing more than a soft press of his lips against my temple. **

**It didn't seem fair, that I had just found the love of my life and now I was being sent away. I knew I'd never see him again. **

---

"So where are you now? Anybody I know?"

April shook her head. "You don't know them."

"You sure? 'Cause last yea' I went through five fosta' homes in less than eight months." Misty held up five fingers proudly.

April snorted, shedding her black jacket as the heat became more intense. "That's not really something to be proud of Mist. You know, if you just tried to do what they tell you maybe they wouldn't…"

"What the hell is this?" Misty snapped, cutting short April's well intentioned sermon.

April glanced over and saw the flash of anger and hurt mixing in Misty's brown eyes. It was quickly hidden away under a façade of bravery and she crossed her arms defensively, awaiting an explanation.

"Sorry." She muttered, digging her black boots into the dirt.

"Yea, you should be. You know betta' than that." Misty puffed her cig one last time before throwing it to the ground and stomping it out. "You can't try to be what they want you to be. You gotta give 'em your worst right off the bat. That way, if they keep you around, the worst is ova' and nobody is disappointed later. You know that betta' than anybody." Misty said quietly.

April nodded and searched for a way to change the subject, embarrassed to have made such a stupid slip. "I'm not in a foster home."

"Group home?" Misty asked, her voice light again.

"No…I'm being adopted." She said hesitantly. Staring through the chain link fence at the baseball field.

"Really?" Misty glanced at her friend and found the dark green eyes were expressionless. She sighed and rose, walking along the long metal bench behind them.

"What?" April turned to watch, she could tell by her friend's sudden quiet that she was bothered by something.

Misty shrugged. "I'm happy for you, that's awll. I mean, if they survived you pushing 'em then, they must be good. 'Cuz you can do some of the worst I've seen."

April averted her eyes and quickly turned away, her heart speeding up. "Yeah."

Misty stopped and sat down, touching April's arm so she would look at her.

"April, you did push them…didn't you?"

She gnawed on her bottom lip and bounced her left leg nervously. "I don't have to."

"Are you kiddin' me?" Misty leapt to her feet. "What are you thinking? You gotta push 'em. If they don't see the real you before it's too late…"

"But that's not the real me Mist! I'm not like that."

"But you're no goody two shoes eitha'. You gotta push their buttons now, before it's too late April. While you can still get away if you have to. If you trust 'em, and you wait too long…Gawd April. Anybody can be Mike Tyson, anybody! You know that." She said, her voice shaking noticeably.

April's vision started to get blurry and her chin trembled. "But…"

"No buts. April, you're right. You aren't like that. You don't throw stuff or steal things or break curfew. But one day you might slip, you might do somethin' wrong…then what?" Misty waited, her own eyes beginning to water. "Eitha' you end up back in the system or…or worse. It's happened before April. I was there, I rememba'."

---

**I remember too. I remember every single stupid detail. **

**That cute little white house with the perfect little white fence, the one I thought I'd live in. That nice couple who said they loved me, who I believed because I was too naïve to know they were lying. That pretty dog in the backyard and whispered promises of adoption and a new life. **

**That pregnancy test that read 'positive' and ruined everything.**

---

Flashes of memories she thought she'd left behind suddenly moved inside her mind and April sank to the ground. She bowed her head to her knees and pressed her fists over her eyes. Tears burned behind her lids and she gritted her teeth as the first of the sobs worked it's way up her throat.

---

**A garbage bag full of clothes I didn't fit, an empty room and bare mattress that wasn't mine anymore. And I was glad for it because it had changed when they knew about the baby. Nothing I could do was right. I was a screw up and they made sure I knew it. **

**And what I hated even more was that I missed it. Even as we left the driveway, left the neighborhood and I was rubbing a bruise hidden under my shirt…even then I was missing them. Because lies about something better are easier to take than the reality of what's worse. **

**And I remember pulling over so I could puke, and covering with dirt before my Social Worker could see the blood.**

---

Her whole body began to shake with the sobs and Misty was immediately at her side, arms wrapped around her shoulders, trying to hold her steady.

"I'm sorry April. So sorry." She sobbed as well and held on tighter, neither felt the gravel grinding into their knees as their tears soaked the earth. "I didn't mean…I just don't wanna see you hurt again. I don't want them to hurt you."

---

**I know she doesn't. I don't either. Now what do I do?**

---

**Hopefully the next update will be up soon. Lemme know what you thought!**


	7. Splinter and Break

**k, here's the next chap, I've nearly edited it to death, so I hope you like.**

---

**I hate that I have to do this. I don't want to, but I know Misty's right. I have to test them.**

**I hope they pass.**

---

Booth fought not to clench his fists as he stared down into the blazing, defiant fire in April's eyes.

"I asked you a question." He said quietly, his temper barely in check.

April didn't even blink. She glanced down at the half full box of cigarettes on the table and shrugged.

"They aren't mine." She said again in the same bored tone as before. It was partly true, she'd borrowed them from Misty earlier that week.

Booth closed his eyes and the hand Brennan had laid on his shoulder pulled backward. The last thing they needed was for him to blow up, April would completely close off on them if he did that.

The girl sat slouched in her chair at the kitchen table, staring blankly with her arms crossed in front of her. Booth was pacing somewhere behind and Brennan stood beside him, a scrutinizing look on her face.

"Booth, why don't you take a deep breath?" She asked quietly, glancing at the back of April's head.

"I know how and when to breathe all by myself Temperance." He snapped though gritted teeth.

Brennan clenched her jaw in anger and took a step closer to him.

"You need to calm down, now. Take. A deep. Breath." She said softly, pausing for emphasis between each word.

Reluctantly, Booth turned away from her and took a deep breath, trying to calm down as he knew he should, but it wasn't easy. April had been a completely different girl the past few days and he was at the end of his rope.

When he opened his eyes, they landed on the dark spots on the carpet by the door, evidence of the mud April had tracked in at 2am three nights ago. That had been their first argument. She'd been obstinate and difficult ever since getting home from school that day, but Booth had tried to ignore it. She went out to pick up milk for dinner from the shop around the corner and didn't come back until 2 in the morning. He'd been worried to the point of being sick and she just waltzed in like it was no big deal. He had exploded at her then, screamed at her for the first time. He'd seen the hurt in her eyes as she screamed right back and then locked herself in her room. That was what Brennan was trying to keep from happening now, though it was obvious neither April nor Booth were ready to make amends.

Booth rubbed his face as the silence in the room got thicker, only broken by the ticking of the clock and a dog barking somewhere outside. His mind was again racing, trying to figure out what could possibly be wrong with April these last few days.

Before, everything had been easy. She never argued, she did chores without complaint, sometimes without even being asked. Then suddenly it was like a switch had been flipped. She became obstinate and defiant, argumentative, oppositional. She wouldn't agree with anything he said. They'd argued and fought almost non-stop for three days over everything from getting her to set the table, to waking up on time in the morning. From swearing in front of Parker, to taking things without asking, namely, Brennan's favorite necklace, which she ended up breaking before she returned it.

Along the way Brennan had been in the middle of it all. Sometimes on his side, sometimes on her side and sometimes just on the sidelines, but she was always there. Part of him was thankful for it, and part of him was irritated that she didn't seem to know how to fix what was happening anymore than he did.

It had all come to a head that evening after a phone call with Tommy. Booth had hoped hearing from the boy would help break whatever spell April was under. Instead Tommy said something wrong, God knows what, and April ended up chucking the phone across the room, killing a lamp that got in the way and shattering them both against the wall.

Booth turned around and his eyes landed back on the cigarette box on the table. His lips again, tension immediately returning to his posture. That had really been the straw that broke the camel's back. Up until then he'd let it all go. Released the anger and frustration coursing through him by going for a run or a round or two in the ring at a gym downtown. But this…smoking…this was something he couldn't ignore. This was slow suicide, plain and simple.

Booth chanced a quick glance at Brennan. She was watching him intently, trying to convey her warning to him again with her eyes. She wanted him to calm down. Well this time he couldn't.

"April."

She shifted slightly in her chair but didn't respond.

"Go to your room." Booth almost cringed at how much he sounded like his own father just then, but succeeded in keeping his serious look as she got out of her chair and walked toward the bedrooms.

Sighing heavily, April rolled her eyes as she passed him.

"That's what I was trying to do in the first place if you had just let me go." She mumbled under her breath.

"Don't talk back April." He said sternly, rubbing his hand over his face again. Stressed didn't begin to cover what he was feeling right then.

April didn't speak but Booth could hear the rustle of her clothes as she continued down the hallway and he didn't need to turn around to see what gesture she threw at his back on her way. Brennan's wide eyes said it all.

"Now even I know what _that_ means."

After a few silent moments a bedroom door slamming shut echoed through the apartment and Booth dropped his head back, looking at the ceiling. Brennan, mistaking his gesture for some form of prayer, quietly gathered the dishes and took them to the sink.

When he'd calmed down enough, Booth relaxed his grinding teeth and went to the kitchen, moving to stand beside Brennan.

"She's out of control." He said quietly, shaking his head and staring at the counter. "I don't know what to do here. I mean…when Parker does something, I take away his crayons or give him a time-out. But this…how do I punish her for this?" Booth mused aloud.

Brennan continued washing the dishes mindlessly, her irritation growing every time he used the word 'I' instead of 'we'. She didn't know why it bothered her so much, after all, she neither wanted to be, nor thought she could handle being April's mother, so why did being left out of her training and discipline feel so…unfair?

"You know Booth…maybe punishment isn't what she needs." Brennan said finally, turning toward him.

Booth looked at her as if she'd just recited Shakespeare in Latin.

"Doesn't need punishment?" He said incredulously, "Bones, she was smoking. She…she broke a lamp, she broke curfew she flipped me off for God's sake! How does any of that not warrant punishment?"

Brennan silently extracted her hands from the warm soapy water, dried them and turned to look at him, now standing toe to toe, per usual.

"Booth, everything is not always so..." She frowned, searching for the right term and landed on one that sounded oddly familiar, "black and white. Not with teenage girls, not with people like April. There are…gray areas."

Booth folded his arms and raised an eyebrow. "That sounds funny coming from someone who can't see past her own microscope." His frustration and confusion combined to create stinging sarcasm.

She pursed her lips at his sniping comment and retorted.

"Human behavior isn't logical Booth. It isn't rational and it certainly isn't always right. If I've learned anything from spending all my time with you, I've learned that." She snapped back.

Brennan could feel every nerve in her body tingling, the electricity that was always present when they argued was there as usual, but this time instead of sexual tension behind it, she could feel the hostility. She reminded herself that it was human instinct to protect the young, to be especially sensitive and tense on the subject of child rearing and that it had nothing to do with she and Booth. But for some reason, her emotional side didn't believe her very much.

Booth swallowed at the bite in her words, but didn't give an inch. "Something needs to be done."

She nodded. "I agree. She needs to _talk_ to someone. Not be yelled at, not be threatened, not even be punished. Not right now. She needs someone to find out what's going on."

Booth didn't respond, only glanced over at the table where the cigarettes still lay. Part of him knew Brennan was right, but a bigger part of him screamed that there 'is right and wrong', and a sixteen-year-old girl smoking was wrong. End of story.

He turned back to look at his partner and Brennan could see the unwavering resolve in his eyes.

She sighed. "Just...give me a minute with her, let me see what I can get before you start throwing your alpha male declarations all around."

With that she stalked down the hall and to the door to April's room.

Her first knock received no response, and her second was rewarded with whatever horrible screaming guitar music April had playing being turned up to an almost deafening volume, drowning out any noise that might pass from either side of the door.

Brennan tried the knob, it was locked.

An image of April's bandaged wrists flashed in her mind and an unpleasant feeling of panic hit her. Cutting was a stress reaction, she knew that. If April was anything, she was stressed. At this point, she wouldn't put anything past the troubled girl.

She immediately reached into her pocket and pulled out her Jeffersonian ID card.

Kneeling down in front of the doorknob, she inserted the card and began wiggling the doorknob. When the lock finally released in her hand, she silently thanked those extra lessons from Booth in Black-Ops.

To her relief, she found April lying on top of the covers on her bed, eyes staring unblinking at the ceiling. Not a razor in sight.

In two quick steps Brennan was at the stereo and she flicked it off.

"Do you make a habit of breaking and entering and then messing with people's music?" April asked once the silence had again descended. She lay atop her deep red comforter with her eyes closed, hair splayed around her on the black pillowcases.

Being shuffled around so much growing up meant April didn't really have any posters or pictures with which to cover the walls, so instead Booth painted them white and told her she could create murals with the paint set Angela had given her. Now what had begun as a small, colorful project in the corner was now encroaching upon two of the four walls and part of the ceiling. April also considered the floor to be the biggest shelf in her room and it was therefore littered with paper, books, clothes, CDs, shoes and anything else she decided to drop where she stood.

Brennan found the chaos of it quite…disturbing.

"It's not breaking and entering if it's a bedroom, and you're music was too loud." She said matter-of-factly, crossing her arms over her chest.

"In your opinion." April responded, eyes still closed.

Brennan took a deep breath. She liked to tell Booth that it was irrational to be angry, but she had to admit she was just as on edge over April's behavior as he was.

April felt the bed dip beside her and opened her eyes.

"What do you want Tempe?" She asked, sitting up and pushing herself back against her headboard.

"I want to know…what's up." She said, proud to be using a correct form of lingo.

April arched an eyebrow. "The ceiling, the sky, some satellites and special debris…"

"You know what I mean April." Brennan almost smiled, remembering that she'd once answered that question the exact same way.

"If that's not the answer you're looking for then I don't know what you're talking about." Her legs pulled up to her chest as she studied her pale fingers laying across her knees, fidgeting and tugging at her pants.

"April, this isn't you. The way you've been acting it's…it's irrational. The sudden switch in your personality, there has to be a reason. What is it?"

April stopped moving. The woman's blue eyes were wide and curios, waiting for her to speak. She'd never received that look from an adult before. Brennan wasn't trying to justify or minimize her behavior, she was trying to understand it. That both pleased and terrified April.

What if she did understand?

"How do you know it's not me? Maybe it is. Maybe I am a damaged piece of hardware you should send back to the store. If you can't handle this," She said, pointing to herself, "then send me back now, because this is me and it's what you're gonna get."

Brennan shook her head slowly. "We're not sending you back April we…" She cut herself off suddenly and turned to look at April more fully, realization dawning like a new day.

Brennan had read enough body language books to know April's didn't match her tone. Her tone and words were challenging and sarcastic, seemingly brave, fearless. But her body language screamed vulnerable and afraid, her arms wrapped around her legs, hair a curtain on either side of her face, she hadn't tied it back all week.

"April, are you doing this on purpose? Do you think we're going to send you away if you act bad enough?"

April averted her eyes and whispered, "What do I care?"

Brennan felt tears rushing to her eyes, memories of herself coming back and spilling over. Looking at April was like looking into a mirror of the past.

She remembred that. If a family got too close, she'd always act out, give them her worst until they put her back into the system. Every single time she secretly wished they would put up with her and let her stay. And each time they didn't she felt her heart break one more time, affirming her belief that everyone left. It wasonly a matter of time.

Brennan closed her eyes and pushed her tears back inside where they belonged. Turning to April, who was now biting her lip, she spoke quietly.

"April…we're not going to get rid of you, I can promise you that."

April had her chin resting on her knees, stubbornly refusing to meet Brennan's eyes. When she saw out of the corner of her vision that Brennan was hesitantly reaching for her hand, she leapt up from the bed and walked over to the window, her back to the rest of the room.

"You can't promise me anything." She said sharply, her voice shaking with tears.

"April…"

"Just go okay?"

Brennan waited for a moment, watching the girl as she stared outside at the stars, hugging herself protectively.

"Please go." The whisper was barely audible, but Brennan heard.

She nodded and rose, making her way around countless pieces of abandoned clothing and books to the door.

"Goodnight April." Silence was her only reply.

Booth sat on the edge of their bed with his head in his hands. His mind was fried. After almost half a week of zero progress in the case, which wasn't really anyone's fault except the slow lab result process. All he'd wanted to do was relax with the girls, maybe play a game or watch some TV.

Instead he'd stepped into WWIII and couldn't seem to get out.

He heard a sound at the door and looked up to see Brennan walking into the bedroom. He watched as she carefully avoided eye contact with him and went to the dresser they shared, extracting a pair of pajamas and changing silently.

"Well?" He said finally after she'd changed from her jeans to pajama shorts and let down her hair.

Brennan sighed and pulled off her shirt. He was still angry; she could hear it in his voice. She waited until she was completely ready for bed before turning to face him and answer.

"She's scared Booth."

He frowned. "Of what?"

"Of…being hurt, being abandoned. She doesn't think we'll keep her if she acts horrible. She's trying to get out before she gets hurt." Brennan explained as best she could, her voice strained with emotion.

Booth walked to the opposite side of the bed, contemplating her words. His frown deepened, he couldn't accept that.

"You're wrong Bones." He said finally, Brennan's head whipped around toward him.

"What do you mean 'I'm wrong'?"

---

**They know these walls are like, paper-thin, right?**

---

He shook his head, the cocky tone she hated coloring his voice. "April's smart, she knows we would never hurt her."

Brennan stood straight with her hands on her hips, her patience all but gone. "No, Booth, she doesn't know that. What she knows is that her entire life people she trusted have left her behind. Everyone she's ever cared about has abandoned her, her mom, her dad,every single foster family…even you Booth. She's trying to protect herself from being hurt again."

Booth frowned turned away, struggling with what he thought was right and what Bones knew to be true. He'd been raised in a home where the punishment always fit the crime. There were no free passes and he felt he was a better man because of it, now why couldn't he get her to understand that?

"It's for her own good Bones." He said, running a hand through his hair. "She can't act like this. She needs to trust us."

His calmness grated her, he was so sure of himself, so convinced his way was the right way. It was a good thing there was a bed between them, she was riled enough to consider causing him series bodily harm if he looked at her the wrong way.

"She doesn't know _how_ Booth! You can't just tell her to trust you and expect she will, she can't. And did you ever stop to think that maybe what's _best_ for her would be for you to stop being so blinded by your stupid rules and give her a break?" She screamed, throwing all her patience and reason out the window.

"I wouldn't expect you to understand, Bones, you're not a parent! You don't know what it's like to have someone depend on you for guidance and protection!" Booth bellowed. Almost as soon as the words left his mouth he wanted to kick himself.

The silence was deafening as they stared into each other's flushed faces. Booth knew his words were insensitive and just plain wrong, but for some reason he was too mad to care, no matter how hard he tried.

Brennan quickly replaced her hurt with anger and stepped forward, speaking in a dangerously low tone.

"Well, Booth, you've never been abandoned, so you couldn't possibly understand what that fear is like either, could you?" Without another word she turned and went into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

---

**They don't deserve this…I don't deserve them. God…what have I done?**

---

**Oh that pesky angst train...**


	8. Eye to Eye

**_Okay, April still has some issues to deal with, and they come out big time in this chap. FYI, it's a little graphic. _**

---

**If people saw me now, they'd think I was nuts…I don't know, maybe I am.**

**I just wish I could see what they see, or what they don't see…I just wish I could see something.**

---

April stood, not moving a muscle, staring at her face in the mirror. She had been doing this for more than an hour, ever since she'd run out of school after lunch.

To most, she might look as if she were looking for pimples or had just gotten lost in space for a moment, but that wasn't the case at all.

Beneath all that stillness was a war waging inside, as a girl who had been told for so long that she was worthless, struggled not to believe it.

She curled her toes into the soft bathroom rug and held her breath against a familiar tightness in her chest. But nothing changed.

Her dark hair fell flat against her cheeks and a pair of tortured green eyes were almost visible through it. She swallowed hard and the flush in her cheeks could have easily been seen against her pale skin.

---

**God, it's not fair! I was going to stop. I was ready to give living a try. And then he said that, the boy in my class. I know I should ignore him…but I can't. I keep hearing his words and I hate them, I hate what they make me think. **

**When I hear stuff like what he said, I know I'll never be okay, and I wonder why I even try. I wonder if it makes me horrible, because I hate them so much. **

**I hate my Mom for dieing and I hate my Dad for leaving. I hate Seeley for choosing Parker, I hate Tempe for trying so hard to understand me and succeeding. I hate school and I hate art and I hate Tommy for being sent away. **

**But more than anything…I hate me. **

---

Her breathing became ragged as she leaned over the sink, no longer able to fight back the sobs trying to burst forth from her chest. Her mascara smudged and her eyes looked even more sunken than before. Her skin crawled and then was ice cold, she felt as if she would suffocate if she didn't relieve the pressure, if she couldn't find some way to escape.

Unthinking, unseeing, she stumbled out of the bathroom and down the hall toward the kitchen. She gasped and wheezed, but couldn't get any air. She squeezed her eyes shut against the pounding in her skull and the raging sirens in her ears, but nothing helped. Her vision blurred and she couldn't stand the thought of staining her cheeks with tears again.

She slammed into the kitchen counter, not realizing she'd been running and without a thought she yanked open the silverware drawer. Adrenalin caused her to pull too hard and the box came flying out of it's tracks, spilling the contents across the kitchen floor with a loud clanging she didn't notice.

April hit her knees and with trembling hands, searched for the serrated knives. As the tortured wails and sobs broke forth, she refused to admit that she was crying, even to herself. Her shaking hands gripped the icy steel and she took a deep breath, hiccupping and wiping at her face, desperately trying to see through the pain.

After a single moments hesitation, she shoved her sleeve up and closed her eyes. She held her breath, and for a single instant, allowed images, memories and voices of the past to fully invade her mind. Something inside her broke, as it had so many times before. She pulled the knife across her skin and it left a ragged tear in it's wake. She did it once, twice more before the noise began to fall away.

Her breathing slowed and the memories stopped. She watched in absent fascination as the crimson liquid marred her delicate skin and she reveled in the calm suddenly washing over her now trembling body.

With a small sigh, she dropped the knife and sat back, curling into a ball.

On the floor amongst the scattered silverware and spilled blood, April let her tears fall.

* * *

Booth took a deep breath before bounding up the stairs to the platform where the squints were congregated.

To say the morning had been tense would be an understatement. Brennan had hardly looked at him during breakfast and her silent treatment was surprisingly effective for someone who probably didn't know what that meant. He hadn't argued when she took her own car to work and he'd refused to call all morning, still unable to convince himself that he'd been wrong, at least, no more wrong than she.

Finally, over a slice of cherry pie in the diner at lunch, which he'd hoped would calm his nerves enough to be civil when he went to the Jeffersonian, he had come to the conclusion that whether or not he'd been wrong about April, his harsh words to Brennan were way out of line. For that, at least, he could apologize.

"Hey guys, got anything?" Booth asked, trying to sound as normal as possible as he approached. Hodgins and Zack gave him an icy glance before returning to their respective computer screens and Brennan didn't even look up from her bent position over the remains.

He sighed. _Great, she's got the squints on her side._

"Hello?" He tried, waving his hand in front of Hodgins' face. "Got any body sloosh from the vic that can help me out?" He asked cheekily.

Hodgins turned toward a microscope on his left. "Nothing so far. Check with Zack."

Booth closed his eyes briefly, counting away the anger he felt rising and slowly turned to Zack.

"How about you Z-man?" He asked, some of the luster now gone from his voice.

Before Zack could answer Brennan spoke.

"Booth, why don't you stop harassing my team and go do something productive at your own office?" She picked up the right femur and examined it closer under a magnifying glass, "No, wait, let me guess, I'm not an FBI agent, so I wouldn't understand." Her icy words were accompanied by a meaning ful glance before she returned her attention to the remains.

Booth winced. "Bones, I…"

"Your victim is eleven-years-old. Female." Zack jumped in, "Asian decent. Bone density irregularities suggest she suffered from Osteogenesis Imperfecta."

"Brittle bones." Booth supplied. Zack looked up, surprised, as did Hodgins and Brennan who flicked her eyes toward him before turning away again.

"What?" Booth said defensively, putting his hands on his hips, "I listen, I learn."

Hodgins started to open his mouth, but closed it again at the challenging glare Booth sent him.

"That's correct Agent Booth." Zack said finally, "That was the cause of the fractures Dr. Brennan noted on her preliminary."

Booth turned to Brennan for the first time. "So she wasn't beaten?"

Brennan straightened, her posture and tone all-business.

"No, not necessarily. Most of the fractures are healed, many years old and her bones are underdeveloped from the constant strain." She put her hands in the pockets of her lab coat, bringing her eyes to Booth's for the first time and fighting down the wave of heat she felt every time she met gazes with him.

"The cause of death was the split between the C4 and C5 vertebrae, her neck was snapped."

Booth nodded but didn't respond, letting his eyes stay on hers a moment longer, hoping to communicate, plead with her. But Brennan grew fidgety under his gaze and turned away just in time to see Angela approaching.

The artist swiped her way up onto the platform and went to Booth and Brennan, a mixture of puzzlement and disgust on her face.

"What is it Angela? Did you get a match in Missing Persons?" Brennan asked, unconsciously moving to stand beside Booth, just outside his personal space.

"Yeah, two." Angela held up two printouts of identical girls with dark hair, dark eyes and bright smiles.

Brennan took the papers from Angela and Booth leaned over her shoulder to read them, though he was being careful not to touch her.

"Kim and Anne Tsu."

"Twins?" Booth asked, already knowing the answer.

Brennan nodded her head morbidly. "They were snatched from a shopping mall in Bethesda in 2003. Anne suffered from Osteogenesis Imperfecta."

Stepping closer to read the file over her shoulder, Booth placed his hand on the small of Brennan's back. She stiffened at the contact and pursed her lips. Shoving the papers into Booth's hands, she stripped away her lab coat and moved briskly off the platform.

"Bones…"

"Let's go."

Booth took another deep breath and quickly followed his girlfriend off the platform, their talk would have to wait.

* * *

"I don't like Mr. Tsu. He didn't seem too broken up." Booth commented as they left their victim's subdivision. He hoped to pass the rest of their thirty-minute drive back to DC in an easy and relatively safe, discussion of the case while avoiding any uncomfortable relationship talk.

"Well, characteristically Asian men are less likely to outwardly convey emotion. Much like in the United States it's culturally frowned upon for men to show any kind of weakness, including crying." Brennan stated to the passing scenery. Then she turned away from the window to face him. "Besides, if he killed his daughters, where is the other body?"

"Who said anything about 'daughters'?"

"You think the other girl is still alive?"

Booth shrugged as his cell phone rang in his pocket.

"We only have one body, don't we?" He flipped open his phone and Brennan considered his argument.

"Booth."

Brennan ignored most of his conversation, silently coming up with arguments to dispute his theory, since there were plenty of reasons why they wouldn't have a body for Kim Tsu.

But after a few moments, Booth's voice began to work its way back into her thoughts, he did not sound happy.

"Well where is she?…What do you mean you don't know, isn't there some sort of attendance policy?…So you're telling me you lost her." Booth grew more and more tense, his grip on the steering wheel tightened and Brennan watched as he clenched his teeth when listening to the person on the other end.

"Fine. Maybe next time you don't wait until three hours later to call me." He slammed shut his phone and moved over to take the next exit off the highway.

Brennan waited for him to fill her in, judging by the red in his face, she wouldn't have to wait long.

"That was April's school." He said tersely. Brennan straightened at mention of the girl's name. "She hasn't been seen since lunch."

Booth slid his gaze over to his partner and for the first time that day, they were seeing eye to eye. Both equally worried about a girl they both considered their own.

---

**Maybe when I wake up it'll all be over. **

**Probably not...but a girl can dream, right? **

---


	9. Undeniable Proof

**_Well, it's been so long since I posted in this fic I wouldn't be suprised if none of you remember it, but in case you do, here's the next chap, more to come later when I'm not about to pass out with exhaustion. _**

* * *

--- 

**I'm so used to being in hospitals, it's sort of like a second home to me now. I stare off into space as the nurse comes in and checks my stitches again. They don't hurt and I tell her so. She smiles at me like I'm nuts, and I know she's thinking 'You're a liar, those hurt like h3ll.'**

And she's right.

---

Brennan sat ramrod straight in the uncomfortable waiting room chair. Somewhere to her left a small child was wailing and behind her there was a group of motorcycle riders muttering curses and making phone calls.

But she didn't notice. She stared unseeing at the wooden table in front of her, the edges worn and banged from years of tragedy and elation, a pile of old magazines sat to one side, mocking her with trivial things.

Booth paced a hole in the carpet on the other side of said coffee table. He couldn't sit still; he was frantic with worry and wished he knew how to make April better. He hated that she was in pain, the worst kind of pain. The kind you can't see or heal with a band-aid and some antiseptic. The kind on the inside that gnaws away at your very being until you have nothing left but the next roll of the dice. Or the next slice of the blade.

Sighing heavily, he fell into the chair beside Brennan, wishing for an escape from his whirlwind of thoughts. Brennan on the other hand, suffered from the opposite problem, not being able to form a single, coherent thought.

"Hey Bones, you okay?" He asked gently, laying his hand on her knee. Their fight was forgotten for now, more important things had moved to the forefront.

After a moment she turned toward him, the blankness in her eyes both broad and piercing.

"There was…so much blood." She said quietly, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth.

The hair on the back of his neck bristled and he fought down a wave of nausea as the memory of April passed out on the kitchen floor assaulted him again. He swallowed and nodded, squeezing her hand as she snaked it into the area between her jeans and his palm.

"I mean, it's illogical that it should bother me so much…I see blood everyday." She sighed, running her free hand through her hair. "But it was as if it was different somehow this time. But blood is blood, so I don't understand why I feel like that was the worst thing I've ever seen. Because it wasn't."

She turned to him, seeking guidance the way she often did when something important to her didn't quite make sense. Of course the distressed, inquisitive look she wore was usually preceded by some common, socially accepted idiom; not the blood of a sixteen-year-old girl.

"It was because it was April." He answered her unspoken question and she nodded, turning away again.

And then, right then and there, Booth realized what a horrible mistake he'd made.

"Temperance." He said, more urgently than intended.

Her head whipped around back toward him, her first name catching her off guard.

"I…" He sighed and turned toward her more fully, "I was an idiot. I'm sorry."

"What are you talking about Booth?" She asked, growing concerned at his odd behavior.

He opened his mouth and then shut it again, the words were harder to find than he thought. After a moment, he stood and took a deep breath, pacing the way he always did when stressed.

"What I said to you last night…I was way out of line." He glanced at her, but her face was neutral, neither challenging nor understanding. He _had_ been wrong, she knew it, and her pride wouldn't allow her to let him off easy.

"You were." She said simply.

Booth continued quickly. "It's wasn't fair of me to ask you to be a part of her life and then discount your opinion the first time you offered it…And I'm sorry."

He finally turned to meet her gaze and was surprised that her posture did not indicate that she wanted to fight with him anymore. Her shoulders now slightly hunched as she absently straightened the pile of old magazines on the table.

Shaking her head, she closed her eyes and sighed.

"No Booth. I'm sorry. I was so adamant about something I know nothing about. You said I'm not a parent and your right. I'm certainly not _her_ parent. Maybe I should just…"

Suddenly Booth was kneeling in front of her, an earnest look on his face. Taking her hands, he held her gaze steadily.

"No, Temperance." He began quietly, shaken to his core by what he was afraid she was about to say, "You _are_ a parent. You are the closest thing to a mother that girl has had in years. She needs you."

Brennan felt her heart rate speed up and resisted the urge to pull away from him.

"She does?" Her voice squeaked, both were surprised by the tears it held.

Booth nodded, removing his hand from hers and placing them on either side of her face.

"We both need you, and she needs us." He kissed her softly and after a moment, she turned to lay her head on his shoulder, clutching him for dear life, hoping the fear she felt in her stomach would not rob her of the family she felt forming around her.

Booth rubbed her back as he continued. "We're in this together from now on. Fifty-fifty."

She squeezed him once more and nodded. "Partners."

---

**I feel like my body is made of dead weight. It's kind of nice. I'm tired.**

---

April stared blankly at the wall across from her bed. Its pallid green color with the supposedly uplifting faded photo of a sparrow on a split-rail fence made her want to throw the nearest heavy object at it.

To her left a nurse was checking the bandages wrapped around her listless arm, humming a tune softly. The woman's kind brown eyes flickered every so often over April's small, black-clad form and a look of pity moved across them. She wondered silently what the girl had gone through in her life to make her think there was no way out and she wished for the right words to say.

"You've got some pretty worried parents out there." She said finally, in a gentle voice that fit in perfectly with the quiet, just-this-side-of-dead atmosphere.

April rolled her head toward her and glared.

"They're not my parents."

The woman merely nodded, placing April's arm beside her on the bed and patting it gently before she turned to leave.

"Well, whoever they are, they certainly do love you."

She was gone before she could see the hope masked with suspicion in the girl's dull green eyes.

---

Booth and Brennan stood outside the hospital room and exchanged a quick glance and a reassuring squeeze of their hands, both feeling more confident than ever that they could do this.

Together, they could do anything. Booth had faith and believed it to be true. Brennan had facts, and knew it to be true. That was all they needed.

April heard the knock at the door and closed her eyes before slowly turning around. There was only one person she wanted to see right then, and he wasn't coming. It was his bunks' turn to clean the barracks.

Booth watched her from his spot at the doorway, her posture was defensive and confident, arms crossed over her chest as she stood by the bed all her weight on her right foot. But her eyes told a different story, they held the look of the small child, one who was frightened to death. Booth, resisted the urge to run over and scoop her up, to protect her from harm forever.

That would have to wait.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, a practiced coolness in her voice he'd only ever seen matched in one other person, the woman standing beside him.

"April, where else would we be?" Booth asked.

April looked at the floor, and shrugged as if she didn't care, but they all knew that was far from the truth.

"I just figured you'd left, that's all."

Keeping his body language neutral, he stepped further into the room, Brennan staying back near the door.

"April…we aren't going to leave you. Not now, not ever."

Brennan tilted her head and observed the interaction. She noticed April's posture softening the longer Booth held her gaze and was relieved to find some color back in the girl's pale cheeks. Her dark hair was matted but pulled back, revealing that 'angel-face' Booth was always talking about. There was now another bandage donning her left arm and judging from what she'd seen at the apartment, it probably had stitches.

April took a deep breath, attempting to loosen the tightness in her chest.

"I wish you wouldn't say that." She sighed, hoping she sounded stronger than she felt.

Booth frowned and reached for her. "Why?"

Shivering, April stepped out of his grasp and turned toward the window, hoping the sun would help warm her chilled body. Blaming the goose bumps on the unbelievably cold air-conditioning, she bit her lip and closed her eyes.

"Everyone leaves."

Booth's face fell and his shoulders slumped, this was not going at all how he planned. Of course…nothing really had concerning April.

He turned when he felt a hand on his shoulder and smiled weakly at Brennan. At his nod she gave him a reassuring squeeze and stepped carefully toward April.

Booth tilted his head slightly when Brennan paused about a foot and a half behind April, seemingly frozen in place. She placed her hands on her hips and he could almost see her biting her lip, even with her back was to him. He suppressed a smiled. She was trying to decide the best course of action.

Taking a deep breath, Brennan stepped forward and mimicked April's position, head tilted up toward the sun with her eyes closed.

"Do you have a list April?"

Upon hearing the voice beside her, April opened her eyes and turned her head.

"What?"

Brennan didn't move. "A list. When I was in the system I kept my list of foster home names on the bottom of a shoe."

April was speechless for a moment, then nodded slowly, never tearing her eyes away from the seemingly calm woman beside her.

"Yeah. Mine's written in black marker on my backpack. Thirteen names."

Brennan nodded and finally opened her eyes, feeling Booth's intense gaze from where he stood but refusing to look over at him, afraid of losing her focus.

"April, how would you like Dickens to be the last name on that list."

April swallowed but made no other response.

"I don't know about you, but I have a very hard time believing in something until I've seen hard evidence of it. April, we, Booth and I, are not going to leave you."

"But how can you be sure?" April squeaked, her voice betraying her as she lost her battle with tears.

"Look at the evidence April." Brennan stepped toward her, and took a steadying breath. "You've done your worst, given us all you can and look." She gestured to herself and then Booth and April warily let her eyes flicker between them. "We're still here…we're right here April and we're not going anywhere. If you need more evidence we'll find a way to give it to you just…"

It was when the first sob broke from April's trembling frame that Brennan frowned, thinking she might have missed something. It was as she watched her sink down against the wall to the floor and stood frozen beside her that she thought she might be in over her head.

But as April curled up against the wall, hugging her knees and shaking uncontrollably, it was like a light bulb went off over her head and she knew exactly what she needed to do. She was on her knees beside the girl even before she knew what was happening.

The fear and adrenalin mixed in her brain until she had no logical thought left and the panic started to set in. Biting her lip and acting on instinct she thought she lacked, Brennan reached out and pulled April into her arms.

She had no idea where the words came from, but they sounded right and oddly familiar as she whispered them into April's hair.

"It's okay, April. I'm here, you're going to be okay." She cooed softly, stroking her hair and back. When April's small frame melted against hers and she clutched the fabric of her sweater, Brennan's overworked brain suddenly decided to kick in.

Her hands stilled, still clutching April close but growing increasingly stiff.

Booth stood on the other side of the room, fidgeting awkwardly and trying to fight the urge to go to them. He knew this was what they both needed, but he couldn't help the protectoral instinct screaming in his ears as he watched instead of participating.

When Brennan's gaze caught his he could see the panic rising there and the pleading in her eyes was something he couldn't refuse.

Brennan saw him approaching and attempted to wiggle away from April, causing the girl to clutch her tighter. Booth knelt beside her and touched her cheek. When she turned to look at him, the confidence and admiration in his eyes slowly quelled her fears.

_You can do this._

As if hearing his silent encouragement, Brennan relaxed and hugged April closer, leaning against Booth's side as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and rubbed circles on April's back.

"Let it out kiddo," He whispered, "you've been brave for too long."

Being in their embrace was the safest April could ever remember feeling since her parents died, and for the first time she believed herself to be brave enough to let it out like Seeley told her to do. So she did.

Half an hour later her hiccups turned to sniffles and her sniffles to attempts at rapid breathing. Brennan felt Booth squeeze her shoulder and slackened her grip slightly looking down into April's flushed face.

"Better?"

She nodded, "Much."

Then she gave Booth and Brennan the one thing they hadn't even realized they wanted so badly.

She smiled.

* * *

**_Hope you enjoyed it, drop me a line if you'd like._**


	10. State of Grace

**_I would suggest listening to Nine Days - Absolutly (Story of a Girl when it is prompted, it will help with the setting. The lyrics are in bold italics. This one is for all the wonderful reviewers and lurking readers, I love you guys too. _**

**__**

**_Disclaimer: I only own April, I wanted Booth, but couldn't afford him._**

---

**How does he know exactly what I need and always manage to give it to me?**

God I love him.  
  
---

The ride back to the apartment had been tense. But by the time they had made dinner and set the table things were starting to get back to normal, or so it seemed.

"But those particulates Hodgins found match the mix of earth and biomaterial found on that bay. That should be where we look first. The other girl could still be alive."

"Why would they kill one girl and keep the other? It doesn't make any sense. We don't have any facts to support that theory Temperance."

"Well maybe not yet, but what's that you told me once? That believing a child is alive is better than assuming he's dead because it gives you something to look forward to rather than dread."

Booth paused chewing his chicken to think about this.

"You're right. Lets get Hodgins to try and narrow down the search area and we can see what we find tomorrow."

April sat quietly at the table, concentrating on cutting her broccoli into smaller bits, hoping it wouldn't taste so bad that way and wishing Seeley had a dog. While doing this, she missed the fact that the adults had stopped discussing the case and were throwing meaningful glances back and forth across the table.

Booth widened his eyes and pursed his lips at Brennan, fork and knife poised motionless over his plate. Brennan jerked her head in April's direction and raised her eyebrows. Both held the same undeniable stubbornness in their eyes they always wore when arguing.

"Are you guys okay?"

April's voice had both of them immediately returning to their plates as if nothing had happened.

A quirk on her lips, April placed a miniscule bite of broccoli in her mouth and grimaced as it went down.

"C'mon guys, I'm not Parker. You can't just spell something instead of say it and hope I don't understand. I'm not blind. Just tell me."

Booth cleared his throat and set down his silverware, wiping the corners of his mouth before speaking.

"April, Bones and I have to tell you something."

April flicked her gaze between them a few times and deadpanned. "You're pregnant."

Brennan started coughing, choking on her Red wine.

"No!" She gasped, eyes wide and face red as her shirt.

"No." Booth reiterated, a bit more calmly.

April looked between them a few times and shrugged. "Okay, then what is it?"

Booth sighed and clasped his hands while Brennan caught her breath.

"Tomorrow you've got an appointment with a friend of mine. Dr. Wyatt."

April furrowed her brow in confusion so Brennan clarified.

"He's a psychologist. The only reasonable one I've ever met." She said, her composure in tact.

April's eyes widened and she pushed away her plate, still half full of broccoli.

"No."

"April."

"No! I'm not going to se some shrink Seeley!" She crossed her arms in defiance.

"Why not?"

April looked at him as if he'd lost his mind. "Why? Because I'm not crazy that's why! I said I wouldn't do it anymore and I won't. I don't need to see a psychologist." She turned to Brennan. "Please Tempe, I promise I won't do it again."

"April he's just going to talk to you." Booth tried.

"Yeah, he's good. He fixed Booth."

April paused and frowned thoughtfully. "Really?" Now mildly interested, she asked. "Why did you have to go see him?"

"He shot a clown."

"Bones!"

"Seeley! I rest my case!"

"Wait a second okay? It was a clown head on an ice cream truck, not an actual clown." His calming words had the opposite affect.

April stood suddenly, her hands on her hips. "I don't care if it was Pee Wee Herman in a movie theatre. I'm not going." She stormed out of the dining room leaving Booth stunned and Brennan perplexed.

"Pee Wee Herman?"

Booth just shook his head. "I'll explain later, c'mon."

They both rose and went to the living room, where April stood in the middle of the floor, perfectly still with her back to them.

After exchanging a glance, Brennan stepped forward.

"April?" She asked, reaching out to touch her shoulder. April whirled around, a concentrated look on her face.

"Shh…Do you hear that?"

Booth frowned. "Hear what?"

"Shh!" She put up her hand to quiet them and turned, stepping further into the room. "I could have sworn I heard…"

Suddenly she stopped. She held her breath and closed her eyes as a wide grin split her face in two.

Booth and Brennan jumped when she suddenly squealed and ran to the window, throwing it open and sticking her head out into the cool night air.

**_This is the story of a girl_**

Immediately the room was filled with a faintly familiar tune, though neither Booth or Brennan noticed right away as they rushed to her side to pull her back in.

**_Who cried a river and drowned the whole world_**

"No! Stop, it's Tommy!" April struggled against them, straining toward the window.

**_And while she looked so sad in photographs  
_**  
Breaking free, April rushed forward, her heart in her ears, cheeks pained from smiling. She stuck both her arms out and waved down at the street.

"Tommy!" She screamed gleefully.

**_I absolutely love her  
_**  
Three stories below three young men had set up an impromptu concert in the middle of the street, no doubt breaking every noise ordinance ever made as they played their hearts out on guitars and drums, one boy singing for all he was worth and hoping to be heard by the girl he loved.

**_When she smiles_**

April closed her eyes, her soul filling with a melody she would always associate with Tommy. It wasn't a normal song for a couple to consider their own, it wasn't romantic in the usual way, but it was them. Completely, utterly, unequivocally Tommy and April, and she couldn't have thought of a more perfect moment than this, sticking her head out the window, listening to him play their song as it danced on the breeze and was carried away.

Pulling herself back inside, April made room for Booth and Brennan who leaned out and found not only a jam session in the street, but window after window in the surrounding buildings being opened and lights turned on as people tried to find out where the noise was coming from.

**_You're clothes never wear as well the next day_**

April struggled to pull on her shoes, her lips and fingers tingled to touch the boy so much she could hardly think straight.

_**And you're hair never falls in quite the same way  
**_  
"He's here he's here." She whispered to herself, one shoe on and hopping with the other in hand toward the door.

**_But you never seem to run out of things to say_**

"How did he get here? God I can't believe he's here." She opened the door, shoelaces flying in every direction as she raced down the hall to the stairs, the words to their song playing in her head.

**_This is the story of a girl  
_**  
Her grin grew wider and she sang along under her breath, ignoring the sound of Brennan and Booth scrambling after her down the hall.

**_Who cried a river and drowned the whole world  
_**  
Shaking her head as she smiled, she wiped away tears of joy and jumped the last few steps. Tommy never was normal.

**_But while she looked so sad in photographs  
_**  
Normal boyfriends would have sent flowers, made a phone call.

**_I absolutely love her._**

Not Tommy.****

---

**He sings to me in the street**.

---

_**When she smiles**_

April burst through the door as he hit the last notes on his guitar and looked up, matching her grin for grin.

"Tommy!" She screamed. With a new burst of energy she ran toward him, hardly able to breathe. Tommy scrambled to pull off his guitar and set it aside just in time to catch April as she slammed into him and he stumbled backward. When he regained his balance he pulled her closer and she wrapped her skinny legs around his waist, hugging him like she would never let go.

For a moment, April was in a state of grace.

* * *

**_I hope all enjoyed this, I do so love pleasing you. _**


	11. LoveBirds

**_Okay, here's the next chap. thanks for all the wonderful reviews, good to know people are still into this after such a long time.

* * *

_**

---

**God I missed him. I missed his hair and his cologne and his hands and his lips and and his clothes and his eyes…  
**  
---

Booth and Brennan stood just outside his apartment door while April, now crying and laughing, peppered Tommy's face with kisses.

"She sure is happy to see him." Booth muttered, glaring in Tommy's direction. But he couldn't help but be a little happy, April seemed overjoyed to see the boy.

Brennan nodded, her eyes glazed with tears she was too strong to shed.

"He's the light in her heart."

Booth looked at her and she blushed slightly when he caught her gaze.

"I know I know, poetic. What can I say? You're a bad influence on me."

Booth only smiled, wrapping his arm tighter around her shoulders. They watched while Tommy and April bid farewell to the other boys who gathered their equipment and shoved it into a beat up Chevy parked down the street.

The neighbors were beginning to close their windows and move back inside their apartments, but April and Tommy still stood in the middle of the street, kissing and hugging as if they hadn't seen each other in years.

Brennan sensed Booth becoming stiff beside her and she glanced over at him.

Rolling her eyes, she took his hand.

"Let's give them some privacy." You overprotective alpha.

Booth remained motionless. "Why? It's not like they know we're here."

"Because that's what they need." She replied, tugging on his hand, pulling him inside. "C'mon Booth. Leave them alone for a minute. They missed each other."

"I can see that." He grumbled, reluctantly following her inside.

Brennan smiled and challenged him to a race upstairs, which she gave herself a head start on.

"Hey! Cheater!"  
They were so involved in their race, they didn't hear a junker Toyota pull away from the curb outside.

April pulled away from the kiss, breathless and grinning like she won the lottery. And frankly, she thought she had when it came to Tommy.

"God, baby I missed you." He breathed in her ear, holding her close on the now empty street.

She laughed lightly and it set his stomach to fluttering. "Gee, I couldn't tell." She gasped as he began placing light kisses along her jaw and throat and suddenly realized they were still in the street.

"Um…" She pulled out of his reach and smiled shyly. "We're kind of…"

Tommy glanced around and then nodded, running a hand through his short hair, his shaggy brown locks had been the first thing to go at military school..

"What do you say we get out of here then?"

"How? I haven't got a car."

A devilish gleam erupted in Tommy's eyes as he pulled a key from his pocket.

"Chris is letting me borrow his Toyota."

April's face lit up and she snatched the keys from his hand.

"Thank you Chris!...I'm driving!"

Brennan was stretched out on the couch, gasping and biting her lip as he tortured her slowly, pleasure she was sure she'd never get used to coursed through her veins.

She couldn't help the small whimper that left her when he suddenly stopped.

"What is it?" She asked when she opened her eyes and saw the concentrated look on his face.

"Doesn't it seem like they've been out there a long time?"

She stopped and thought back. How long had they been making out on the couch? Now that she thought about it, it did seem like a while since their impromptu race had turned to foreplay…though they'd been sure not to get too heated since a pair of teenagers could come through the door at any moment.

"It does seem like it's been a while."

At that he bolted off the couch and went to the window. When he turned back around she was fixing her hair and straightening her shirt. She stopped though, at the look of fear on his face.

"They're gone."

* * *

**_Duh Duh Duuuuuhhhh...you didn't think the Angst train had left for good...did you?_**


	12. Two Sets of Soul Mates

**_Here's the next chap, thanks again for your patience in the delayed updates for a while there guys._

* * *

**

---

**Okay…so maybe running off without saying anything wasn't the best idea.  
**  
---

"What the hell are you trying to do April? Give me a coronary?" Booth said, doing his best not to yell…and not really succeeding.

"Hey! Don't yell at her." Tommy stood and stepped forward, not a hint of intimidation in his posture.

"You stay out of this."

"Try and make me."

Booth and Tommy stood toe to toe in April's bedroom, staring each other down. The air was thick with testosterone and tension, but Booth was impressed nonetheless that Tommy was holding his ground. But that didn't change the fact that he was going to have to kill him.

Two hours after they ran off Tommy and April came waltzing into the apartment, slightly startled by Booth and Brennan's strong reaction to their little disappearing act.

It had been excuses, frustration, anger and ultimatums ever since.

"Stop it!" Brennan and April screamed at the same moment. Both men turned and without hesitation, April stepped forward.

"It wasn't Tommy's fault, Seeley. I just…I wasn't thinking. I didn't think you'd notice I was gone." She dropped her eyes, obviously well aware of how badly she'd screwed up.

Booth was taken aback.

"Didn't think I'd notice? April, in the past two months you've been kidnapped and in and out of hospitals, including today. How would I not notice?"

"Hospital?" Tommy frowned and turned to look at April, who was glaring daggers at her godfather. "What hospital? Today?"

Brennan decided to step in before Booth spoke again and made things any worse.

"April." The girl's eyes flicked toward her and back again. "Booth and I were worried, please don't run off without telling us where you're going again. We care where you are all the time."

April looked at the ground and then at the mural growing at the intersection of her walls. She nodded.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Next time I'll let you know."

Brennan nodded and pulled Booth from the room.

"If he thinks he's staying in there with her he's got a death wish." Booth grumbled when Brennan had safely escorted him down the hall to their room.

She merely nodded, knowing it was pointless to argue with him when he was like this. She crossed her arms and leaned against the door, watching as he paced away his anxiety.

After nearly five minutes, he collapsed on the bed, his head in his hands.

"Do you think I was too hard on her?" He half said, half groaned.

Brennan smiled sympathetically, glad he was asking her opinion.

Coming to sit beside him, she clasped her hands in front of her.

"No. I don't."

He looked up, the expression on his face saying he didn't believe her.

"Really?"

Brennan nodded. "You were worried, scared. I was too. Your reaction was completely appropriate under the circumstances and I think you were right not to punish her."

Booth dropped his head again. "Yeah, well…"

Sensing he was going to change his mind, she continued hastily. "I mean it. April didn't set out to worry you. She saw something she wanted and she went after it."

"But how could she not know I would be worried sick, literally sick, not knowing where she was?"

She pursed her lips and Booth watched as shadows of her past moved across her eyes.

"Think about it Booth. When was the last time someone cared where she was?"

Booth did think about it. And then he understood.

"Poor kid." He said sadly, shaking his head and rubbing his face.

Brennan nodded. Suddenly feeling constricted by emotions she'd always chosen to ignore, she stood and moved toward the window, looking out into the sunset. Her arms folded across her chest. Two stories below a young man kicked the flat tire on his car and a woman ran after her dog, shouting obscenities and waving wildly with her hands. But the look on Brennan's face was blank, as if she wasn't seeing any of it.

Sensing that her mood had changed, Booth silently got up and moved to stand behind her. He wrapping his large arms around her protectively and waited. He didn't speak; he knew it was best to wait until she had fought down her demons on her own.

They stayed that way for a few minutes, watching cars and people under the cloak of increasing darkness, feeling each other's heartbeats vibrate.

Brennan turned her head slightly and whispered, "I'm glad April has you. It's…more than I ever had."

Booth felt an immense sadness well up at the heavy tone of her words and found that, for once in his life, words failed him. He gave her a quick squeeze and kissed her hair once before she turned in his arms to face him.

Capturing his lips before he could see the shadows in her eyes, she allowed Booth to kiss away all her fear and heartache. A moment later when they separated, her blue eyes were light again and she smiled.

"I believe we have some unfinished business to attend to."

Booth gave her his cockeyed, I'm-too-sexy grin and kissed her quickly once more.

"We do. But first, I need to escort Boy Wonder off the premises."

---

**I'm not going, and that's final. Nothing he says is going to make me go to some whack job shrink.  
**  
---

"The hospital?" Tommy moved into April's line of vision as the door shut behind Brennan and Booth.

She shrugged and turned away, picking at a loose thread on her purple tie-dye blanket.

"It's no big deal." April said quietly, refusing to meet his gaze.

She waited for him to refute her statement, but he didn't respond. Just as she was about to turn back toward him, he grabbed her arm and moved her sleeve so he could see the fresh bandages there.

"Tommy!" She exclaimed, yanking back her hand.

"You're doing it again?" He asked, his voice quiet and disbelieving. She turned to look at him and her heart sunk to her shoes, he looked hurt… betrayed.

"Tommy I'm not…"

"The bandages on your arms say otherwise." He cut her off, slowly recovering and the pain on his face was replaced with concern. "You said you would stop…you said...I need you April."

April bit her lip as tears sprang to her eyes and she folded her arms across her chest.

"Tommy…I'm not going anywhere. I promise." She tried.

His face closed up and he shoved his hands in his pockets. "That's what you said before. That you promised…God, April." He suddenly moved forward, causing April to step back until she was pressed up against the wall. "What am I supposed to do without you? You're everything I've got…if you…if you hurt yourself too badly…" His voice cracked and he blinked hard, knowing boys shouldn't cry.

"I know Tommy, I know. I'm not going to do it again."

They stood mere breaths apart, silently searching each other's eyes for understanding.

April could feel him tensing up and guessed that he didn't believe her. Grasping desperately for something to hold on to she blurted out, "They want me to see a shrink."

"I think that's a good idea." He replied, not missing a beat.

"You're kidding."

"No. April…the things you've seen and been through…I don't know how you've made it this far keeping all of that bottled up the way you have."

Immediately she turned away, her face set in stone.

"I'm not going." She said, stubbornly.

Just as Tommy was about to reply a quick knock sounded and the door swung open.

"Hopkins," Booth said, "Time to go."

Tommy closed his eyes and sighed. Then, leaning forward, he hugged April while whispering. "I'll see you tonight."

With a miniscule nod of her head, she pecked him on the lips and watched him follow Booth out the door.

"I need to tell you something. Two things actually."

Booth lay in bed with Brennan beside him, skin on skin. She was lazily tracing patterns on his chest while he fiddled with her hair and the night sounds outside lulled them to sleep.

She stiffened slightly when she spoke, but immediately relaxed again.

"Now what was that you were telling me about 'bedroom talk'? That definitely sounds too serious to qualify as 'bedroom talk'."

Booth smiled. "Well, I am probably breaking my own rules here, but I need to tell you."

Seeing that she wasn't going to deter him from whatever all-too-serious topic he felt the need to divulge, Brennan gathered the blanket up around her and shifted so she was propped up by her elbow and facing him.

"What is it?"

Booth also shifted and they were facing each other. With a tender smile he reached out to tuck her hair behind her ear. "You were great today, at the hospital. You were exactly what she needed."

Brennan smiled softly, that wasn't what she had been expecting. "It felt…good. To be there for her. Scary but good." Booth nodded and she knew he understood. "It was the first time I've ever really felt like, 'I can do this'. Parenting, being someone's mom. I think…I can."

"I'm glad, I think you can too. I know you can." Brennan noticed how he was suddenly picking at the sheet instead of looking at her.

"Booth, was there something else?"

He sighed and nodded. "You remember that meeting I had with Cullen today?"

"Yeah..."

"He's um," He stilled his hand and looked her square in the eye, "He's sending me undercover. Big case."

Brennan grew still and after a moment turned away and sat up against the headboard looking straight ahead at the wall.

"Temperance?"

She'd heard but couldn't believe. The first thing to pop into her mind was 'I'm not ready' 'It's too soon'. She'd turned away, ready to deal with the fear the best way she knew how, run.

But as she started to sit up her eyes fell on the single, solitary picture of her mother that she owned. It was displayed atop Booth's dresser on the far wall.

She paused long enough to let her brain catch up. Booth had faith in her, April trusted her…if she could only find a way to have confidence in herself, she could do this.

Never one to back down from a challenge, Brennan pursed her lips and clasped her hands together tight.

She turned to Booth and he almost flinched at the fiery determination that lay in her deep blue eyes.

"I can handle this."

And the way he smiled at her quelled any doubts she may have had to the contrary.

---

**Nightmares follow me like my shadow on the sidewalk. Fear sometimes grabs me by the throat and squeezes until I can't breathe. Trust and betrayal have always gone hand in hand. Love and pain. Apathy and protection.**

That doesn't mean I need a shrink.

---

April waited patiently until midnight, not making a sound or moving a muscle. She didn't want Seeley to have a reason to check on her.

She was bold, not stupid.

A light knocking on her window and she was off the bed in an instant, pushing it open and welcoming Tommy inside with a kiss.

"Geez, baby, let me get inside first. You're two stories up you know." He muttered against her lips.

"Oh, sorry." April pulled back and allowed Tommy full entry into her room before attacking him again, this time falling backward onto the bed.

"You're squishing me Tommy!" She complained, trying to push him off her.

"I'm sorry but you tripped me." He replied, rolling to one side. The room was dark though, and he couldn't see. He ended up flopping onto the floor.

"Shhhh! Tommy, if Seeley finds you in here he'll kill you!" She whispered loudly through her laughter.

"Ah! Damn girl, what's on your floor?" Tommy groaned and pulled a boot from beneath his back, and laughed when she hit him in the face with a pillow.

"Shhh!"

"What was that?"

Brennan rolled her eyes, irritated that he'd stopped what he was doing.

"Neighbors." And she silenced his protest with her lips.

---

**Tommy wanted to go further…I told him I was serious about Seeley killing him.  
**  
---

Several hours later, before the sky was lit with the eerie gray of dawn. Before birds left their nests to find breakfast or paperboys started their routes, the apartment was silent and asleep.

Booth snored softly, his face buried in the hair of the woman curled of beside him. Tommy snored a bit louder, sprawled out across the small bed made for one because the other occupant wasn't beside him.

Sensing the warm space where April was supposed to be was empty; he slowly rolled over and opened his eyes. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, her head in her hands.

"Baby?" His voice was hoarse with sleep and he squinted at her in the darkness. "April, you alright?"

She took a deep breath and lifted her head, whispering, "I'm fine, go back to sleep."

But Tommy didn't buy it. Sitting up, he ran a hand across his face to get rid of the sleep and then touched her back.

"You're cold."

April nodded but didn't move.

A bit puzzled by her silence, he began rubbing slow circles on the back of her shirt, hoping to warm her a bit and get her to talk. It wasn't until she turned and the streetlight illuminated tear tracks on her cheeks that he knew what was plaguing her.

"Nightmare." It wasn't a question. April nodded again.

Sighing, he touched her hand and squeezed. "Wanna talk about it?"

After only a moment's hesitation she turned toward him. "You don't mind? I mean, you've heard it before."

"But sometimes it helps right?" He replied, laying back down so he could look up at her.

"Sometimes."

"Then go ahead."

Taking a deep breath, she drew his hand into her lap so she could distract herself with something, namely, playing with his fingers.

"I was at home, back on the base. I was looking for my…my mother. I um, I was running through the house, calling her. I knew she was there because I could smell her perfume…But she wouldn't answer me." April paused and shifted on the bed, working up the courage to continue. "I went into my dad's office and he was there…working at his desk. Like always. I um, I asked him where she was…but he wouldn't say anything…like he couldn't hear me." She swallowed hard and licked her lips. She hated this nightmare. Tommy squeezed her hand reassuringly and she continued.

"I walked over to him, I said 'Dad, where's Mom, she's here isn't she?' and he…he, uh, he looked up at me…and…" Her voice cracked and it looked as if she couldn't continue. Tommy started to reach for her but she shook her head. "No, I have to get it out."

He nodded and sat back.

"He looked up at me and…there was a…a hole. Right between his eyes and I could see the wall behind him through it. I…I started to scream, but I didn't make a sound. I turned around to run…and there was…blood. Blood everywhere on all the walls and all his books. It was on me…I…and then I woke up." She finished and Tommy could feel her trembling. This time he reached for her and she allowed him to pull her tight against him, his arms wrapped around her, protecting her from all he could.

"I'm sorry." He whispered and his heart broke with every tear and swallowed sob that shook her small frame.

After a few minutes her breathing returned to normal, but he knew she wasn't asleep.

"Tommy? Did you ever…did you ever just want to run away?" She whispered even quieter than before, as if she was afraid the darkness surrounding them would hear.

He smiled and kissed her temple. "Yeah, sure. All the time."

April didn't smile, she continued in that disturbingly calm, detached voice that was so uniquely hers. "Why didn't we ever run away?"

He turned so he could see her, her eyes were still shining with tears. Settling back, he followed her gaze to the ceiling.

"You never asked." He sighed. "What's this anyway? I thought you liked Seeley and Tempe?"

"I do. It's just…their relationship is so new. They need time to grow, and…constantly worrying about me isn't helping any. They deserve better than me."

Tommy's grip on her tightened and he turned suddenly. "Don't ever say that. Ever. You understand?"

April's gaze flickered toward him and she could see the urgency in his eyes. "Yes."

Tommy relaxed again and a few more minutes of silence ensued. The kind of soft, comfortable silence only the early morning can bring.

"Baby, why don't we run away? Lets just…go. Somewhere where nobody knows us…where the past can't find us." She held her breath and waited for his answer, knowing that if he said 'yes' she would follow without hesitation. And if he said 'no'…

"No." His response was even and resolute.

April turned to face him. "But you said…"

"I know what I said, but it's different now. Tomorrow I have to back to school…I'll face whatever Court Marshall, or obstacle course they decide I deserve for sneaking out because it'll be worth it. Seeing you is worth it." He loosened his grip on her and turned to face her more fully. "And you…this place, Seeley and Tempe, they are the best thing that's happened to you…probably ever. They care about you, they love you. I can't…won't be responsible for taking you away from that."

April watched determination, strength and love playing like a symphony in his eyes and she smiled. Kissing him slowly as the need for sleep returned, she laid her head on his chest and squeezed his middle, his arms encircling her once more.

"Thank you."

Tommy smiled and kissed her forehead.

"And you're going to that shrink."

Too tired to argue and too in love to try, she shrugged.

"Okay."

---

**How can I argue with that logic?**

---  



	13. Strength That Lies Within

**_Here's the next chap. thanks for all the support in this little April endevor, lots of you have told me how you don't usually like to look into fics with original characters, so thanks for giving this one a chance. Dedicated to all my wonderful readers, the ladies in teh Anti-Boneyard (courtesy of my friend Willgurl, check it out!) and to Booth and his sexy jeans. _**

* * *

There are 206 bones in the human body. It has approximately 5 quarts of blood. 38 organs. Facts. Empirical truths Brennan knew to be true. One simply cannot survive on only 103 bones and 2.5 quarts of blood. She knew that.

But, then why did it feel like half of her was missing?

"Zach have you finished your body yet?" Brennan asked shortly.

"No Dr. Brennan there are some marks that I…"

"Great. I told the DA we'd have them done by two. I can't…" She stopped. Zach was staring at her, wide eyed and stunned. Angela and Jack were both exchanging and throwing concerned looks toward her.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. When she still couldn't get her heart rate to come down she sighed. Turning on her heel, she bounded down the platform steps and shut the door to her office behind her.

Booth had been gone for nearly three weeks and he'd only been able to call twice. She wasn't really worried at this point…just missing him.

"Deep breaths Temperance. Zach didn't do anything wrong. He's just doing his best and not allowing himself to be rushed, like you taught him. C'mon." Brennan paced in front of her desk muttering and fanning herself, trying to calm down. "I had no right to snap at him…I should apologize."

She stood staring at the door, but didn't move.

"Nobody blames you, you know."

Brennan nearly jumped out of her skin and turned to face the person sitting quietly on her couch.

"April, how did you get in here."

The girl shrugged. "Through the door. Same way as you."

Brennan made a face at her and started needlessly straightening the files on her desk, embarrassed to have been caught in one of her weaker moments.

"You really miss him, huh?"

Brennan looked up and met April's dark green eyes. "I know how you feel. It's tough, not having your other half around, especially when you feel like…you need someone to hold you together."

Brennan could only nod and their eyes were locked in a gaze filled with common sorrow as understanding passed between them. Then, as both were more comfortable pretending emotions didn't exist rather than confronting them, they immediately broke the contact and turned away.

Brennan glanced at the clock and was about to ask why April wasn't at school when she remembered.

"How was your meeting with Dr. Wyatt?" She looked up, waiting for the heavy sigh and huge eye roll that had followed that question every time it had been asked for the past two and a half weeks. When it didn't come, she looked up from the email she'd been skimming over. April sat perfectly still, hands clasped tight in her lap and stared at the table in front of her.

"Um…I don't know." She shrugged and turned her head, nearly gasped when she saw tears standing in the girl's eyes and immediately gathered that something was wrong. Putting aside the papers, she moved to lock the door and then went to sit beside her.

"What do you mean? Is everything alright?"

Again, April only shrugged, now blinking hard so as to not let the tears fall. "One minute I was just staring at him, like I always do, not saying anything. The next…I said something about him reminding me of my dad…and I just...I couldn't stop talking."

---

"He says I need closure…what the hell does that mean?" April's tears burst forth but her voice remained steady, angry. Brennan's heart seized, her mind racing with the right thing to do. She almost glanced at the door, wishing Booth were there to show her how to comfort this girl, not realizing she was already doing it.

"I..don't know, April. I'm…not very good at psychology."

April wiped her sleeve across her eyes and nose and took a shaky breath. "I just…I miss them, you know?" She mumbled "You and Seeley are great but…I really miss my mom and dad. I miss them and I wish…" Her voice grew tight and she trailed off, turning her watery green eyes on Brennan, hoping for the answer to a question that was not clearly defined.

---

Okay, I mean, my dad wasn't some abusive psycho, and he wasn't cold. He was just…military, through and through. He showed his love in other ways. In the way he trained our guys to be the best so they could protect us as well as possible. In the way he made sure I always did my homework and brushed my teeth, he just took care of his own. And if I ever doubted that he loved me, mom made sure I didn't doubt for long. She never said 'I love you' either, it was always 'we love you'. Always. No matter where we were, even if dad was a hundred miles away, she'd kiss me on the forehead at night or put a band aid on my scraped knee during the day, and she'd smooth my hair and say, 'we love you very much, baby'.

---

Brennan watched as April picked at her fingers and chewed on her lip, her self-conscious fidgeting reminding her so much of herself at that age that she had to close her eyes for a moment to focus.

Then, putting a gentle hand on April's arm, she squeezed. "You wish you knew why."

April nodded, holding her breath as the sobs worked up again and her tears fell down. She was used to Brennan's brutal honesty, but the heart aching accuracy in pinpointing what April was thinking was something she still had problems coping with.

"I do." Suddenly she was hugging Brennan tight, surprising her. But she quickly recovered and rubbed the girl's back as she pressed her face into her shoulder and sobbed. "I know why my mom left, she couldn't help it…but what about dad? Why did he have to leave me too? Was life with me really as bad as everyone always says?"

Brennan was so caught up in the helpless ache invading her chest at being unable to soothe April's pain, that she at first didn't hear the question. But when she did, her hands stilled and she pulled back.

April looked up, her face blotchy and her eyes red and rimmed in running mascara. She hiccupped and waited.

Brennan frowned. "Who says that? Who could ever say that life with you was anything other than…unexpected and…completely…enjoyable?" Brennan was outraged at the very idea of someone taking the fragile self-image of this young girl and tainting it with a lie so hurtful as that.

April laughed at Brennan's awkward wording and sat up, still hiccupping slightly but trying to calm down. "A surprisingly high number of people actually." Brennan still seemed puzzled and was now bordering on seething rage, so she continued quickly. "Well, plenty of foster families, not just parents, but the sibs are brutal. Then sometimes my teachers or…the kids at school.

---

**Okay, that was something I didn't meant to say. I mean, you'd think the whole 'parents' dieing thing would give him enough material to last us twelve sessions…and yet I keep talking. About them, about the fosters and the system. About Tommy and Seeley and Tempe…but what I hadn't intended to talk to him about was Peirce.**

---

"This boy said that to you? That you were worthless and…that?"

April nodded. "He did, in front of the whole class. That was…um, the day you, found me. Remember?"

Remember? How could she forget?

"He made you do that?" Brennan sounded livid and April almost smiled, she sounded as if she would karate chop the next warm blooded mammal to walk through her office door.

"Well, not make me per say. More like…gave me the last push over the edge. I mean, most days I ignore him, it's just talk…"

"You mean he says this sort of thing on a regular basis?"

April merely flicked her eyes toward her, refusing to confirm or deny Brennan's guess. "On that day…I was already upset because of hurting you and Seeley…"

"When did you…"

"For making you fight because of my bad behavior. So anyway, that day instead of just saying it, he grabbed my arm and pushed me up against the locker. He's strong and I couldn't get away…He, um, he whispered to met that no one would ever love me so I should take what I get…then he, uhm, then he…kissed me. Or, made me kiss him."

Brennan sat opened mouthed as the girl's confession settled on her ears. After a moment, her stunned expression turned to a tight-lipt frown and she felt the rage rising within her.

"Did anyone, does anyone at the school know? Teachers? Your principal?" Brennan asked in as controlled a voice as she could muster. She and April now sat side by side and she held her white hands in tight fists while she waited for the girl to answer.

April, the black curtain of hair still on either side of her face, shook her head from side to side slowly. "No," she almost whispered, "He's…rich. His parents are on the school board. He can do whatever he wants."

"No." Brennan said sharply, causing April to tense up. She closed her eyes a moment, willing herself to calm down. Then, reaching over, she pushed April's hair aside and waited for the girl to meet her gaze.

She did, tentatively.

"April, no one has the right to do that. To make you feel small and…powerless. No one. You have to stand up for yourself."

"That's easy for you to say Tempe!" April said suddenly, exasperated and breathless from trying to keep herself from crying. "You're strong. You have a gun and you kick criminal butt! I'm just…me. I'm nobody, nothing." Again her head fell forward and Brennan wasn't sure whether to be angry or upset. Perhaps she was a little of both.

"April, why would you…"

"Because it's true!" She stood, shouting and moved away, crossing her arms protectively over her chest. "Nobody has ever wanted me. Why would they? I can't stand up for myself Tempe, there's nothing to stand up for. How would I do it? I'm not strong enough Tempe, I'm just not."

Brennan sat on the couch, caught in a staring match with an emotionally wounded teenager standing not ten feet away. Suddenly, the irony of the whole situation hit her. April, standing there with her black tank and pants, silver chains on her pants and boots. April, with her black nail polish and hair, teary eyes with the running mascara and that stubborn tilt to her chin…it was ironic. That child thought she was nothing, weak, and yet Brennan couldn't imagine a single person in the world who would be brave enough to pick a fight with her at that moment.

Averting her eyes so the ever-perceptive April wouldn't see the smile in them, she stood and slowly closed the distance between them.

"April, you're wrong." She said quietly when she stood directly in front of the girl. "You're the strongest person I know."

April, who'd been watching Brennan carefully until them, suddenly dropped her gaze disbelievingly. In the next moment, she felt a gentle nudge on her chin, pulling her gaze back toward Brennan's.

"I'll prove it to you."

* * *

**_Alright, we're winding down now, The Angst Train may finally be reaching it's destination. If you're still onboard, go ahead and drop me a line._**


	14. Unconventional Learning

**_I'd forgotten the great high you get from great reviews. You guys are awesome and you fuel my muse._**

---

**She told me we were going shopping with Angela, she didn't say anything about sweating beforehand. I'm sorry, what part of 'I don't like to sweat' is hard to understand?**

---

April tugged at her long black sweater and shifted from foot to fit in her red ballerina flats, a present from Angela, doing her best not to scowl at her surroundings. She wasn't sure she'd ever shared her disdain for physical activity with Brennan before, but she was definitely wishing she had now.

Tin Fou's Martial Arts Academy was closed on Friday afternoons, but as a personal favor to his favorite author, he'd agreed to lend out the use of his gym. That was how April had ended up here, in the middle of a sea of red and blue exercise mats that smelled of sweat and feet, wishing she'd woken up sick that morning. 

Brennan reappeared from the hallway she'd gone down a few minutes ago and approached April dressed in a tank top and shorts, pulling her hair into a ponytail.

"I set some clothes on the bench for you," she held out a hair tie, which April hesitantly took. "The locker room is down the hall, second door on the left." She started to turn away to tye her shoes, but stopped when April didn't move.

April cocked her eyebrow at Brennan's look. "What? You don't actually think I'm going to…box you do you?"

Brennan frowned. "No. This is martial arts, not boxing. And I'm just going to be showing you some basic defense techniques, not engaging in actual combat. Besides, I have something to show you first."

"But, Tempe, I don't think this is…" She started to protest, a hint of whining in her voice, Brennan crossed her arms and gave her a blank look. "I don't like to sweat, it's gross." This time, her argument not only fell on deaf ears, Brennan cocked an eyebrow and tilted her head, as if April were reciting prayers in the original Hebrew. With a deep sigh, she rolled her eyes and grumbled, "Fine." turning down the hallway Brennan indicated.

---

**I think these shorts make me look fat.**

---

April crossed her arms, self consciously covering as best she could the horizontal blemishes running up and down her forearms. She'd been out of bandages for quite some time, but some of the scars were red and still very visible against her thin white skin. She hated to see them, which was why she usually wore long sleeves. She felt small and naked in the tank top and shorts Brennan had given her and she wished silently for her black baggy pants and sweatshirt she usually wore.

Brennan turned back to her and thrust a small faded photo she'd just pulled from her bag out at her.

Hesitantly, April took it. "Who's this?"

The girl in the photo wore a black miniskirt, knee high black boots and electric blue hair. But the eyes, piercing blue eyes, were unmistakable.

"This is you." She said in answer to her own question. Brennan nodded and sat on a nearby bench, motioning April to do the same.

"It was taken by my second foster family three days before they sent me away. They didn't approve of my…fashion sense."

April smiled wryly. "Yeah. Been there, done that."

Brennan reached for the photo and studied while she spoke. "In my office, you said I couldn't understand your fear because I'm strong and because I kick butt. But it wasn't always that way. When I was fifteen, I was just like you. Scared and lonely and convinced I was as worthless as everyone thought." April's eyes fell to the photo and she shivered, she could see the similarities between herself and teenage Brennan.

"What changed?" She asked in a small voice, arms folded tight around her slight frame.

Brennan sighed and began folding the photo to put it away. "About a year after I got my doctorate I went to El Salvador to help identify victims of the Death Squads." April's eyes widened, but Brennan didn't notice. "While I was there, identifying the remains of what appeared to be a thirteen year old girl, I was kidnapped and thrown into a dark, dirt cell.

Everyday for three days a man came in and made me believe I was going to die. When I got out, I swore, among other things, that I would never let anyone make me feel that way again."

The look on April's face, a mixture of disbelief and horror, remained firmly in place as she responded quietly, "So you took up karate?"

Brennan nodded. "And gun lessons, but Booth would kill me if I taught you that, so I thought maybe instead you'd like to learn some basic self defense moves."

April eyed the blue exercise mats warily, still unconvinced.

Brennan thought for a moment, still nervous about whether or not this was the right thing to do. But, she reminded herself, she had thoroughly thought this through. Perhaps even OVER thought about it. This was what she had to give April, and she was compelled to give it. "April, I already know how strong you are. Booth and Angela know it, now all we have to do is convince you."

April took a deep breath and surveyed her surroundings one more time. Finally, after an eternity to Brennan, a small smile on the girl's lips put her racing mind at ease.

"Can you teach me to flip people over?" She asked, only half joking.

Brennan smiled and stood, pulling April up beside her. "Eventually, but first, the basics."

---

**What could it hurt? Maybe I'll finally get those six pack abs I've been wanting…**

---

Booth ran a hand over his face, feeling the scuff of five unshaven days under his fingertips as the local PD loaded Georgio Rocka into a squad car. Behind him four other low life drug dealers were waiting for their own blue and white chariot ride to the State Pen and he didn't bother glancing back at them as their insults and threats hit his ears when he tucked his badge back inside his pocket.

It turned out the multi-state drug trafficking ring hadn't been all that hard to crack. Rocka and his crew took to Booth, or Vince Saunders as they knew him, very quickly and he'd ascended the ranks quicker than expected. But not quick enough. It had been thirty-two days since he'd last spoken to Brennan and April, and nearly forty-seven since he'd last seen them. He missed them, and Parker and his home. He was ready to go back.

After he'd finished cutting red tape with the other officers, he climbed into his rusted out Chevelle with a sigh, he couldn't wait to get back to his own truck either. With a sigh, he pulled out of the dark Houston ally and started back to his hotel to begin packing.

His pulled out his phone once his bag was packed, intending to call Brennan and let her know he was coming home, but it rang in his hand. Recognizing the number, he answered with a grin.

"Hey, Hot Stuff."

There was a pause, and he was almost afraid it was April calling him from Brennan's phone.

"Booth? I thought you couldn't answer your phone while on a case. I was going to leave you a message."

Booth grinned, relived he hadn't embarrassed himself. "Well I can't, but the case just ended."

"Really? You're coming home?" Brennan asked, excitedly.

"I'm on my way to the airport now." He paused to throw his suitcase in the trunk. "I missed you babe."

He heard her sigh and imagined her curled up on the couch, phone pressed to her ear, wearing that smile only he could elicit from her. "Me too. I can't wait to see you."

"Me either. How's April?"

"Oh, she's…okay. I mean, fine physically. She had a productive meeting with Dr. Wyatt a few weeks ago, but…I have some concerns."

Booth frowned and shifted his phone to his other ear. "What kind of concerns."

"Well, knowing how much I hate psychology here, I think she's got some self-esteem issues, but I have been working with her on that and I think it's helping," She was deliberately vague on what she and April had actually been doing, unsure of how Booth would react, she continued quickly, "but I do remember why I called now."

"What's that?" Booth climbed into his car, his body protesting with fatigue from all his sleepless nights on assignment, but he took solace in knowing things would be back to normal in a few hours.

"The other day when April and I were talking…she said some things. They reminded me of things I used to say." She stopped but Booth remained quiet, realizing this was one of those times when it was best not to push her. "She misses her parents Booth. She wants to know why her dad left her. She…blames herself."

A long sigh on the other end told Brennan that Booth was still there, tired and worried, probably rubbing his face the way he did when he was thinking hard, but he didn't say anything. "I know it's a lot to ask…but an idea just occurred to me, do you think there's any way for her to get those answers?" She continued before he could voice his confusion with that statement, "I mean, I had that videotape from my mom…are you aware of anything like that for April from her dad?"

Booth shook his head, eyes still closed as he listened to the sound of her voice. "No Bones. I wish I did, but your dad was a fugitive, you know? An expert at hiding things. Joey was never that way. If there was something he would've found a way for me…" Booth's eyes flew open and he narrowed them on a memory he had almost forgotten.

"Booth?"

"Love you Babe, but I gotta call you back."

"Wait, what…"

He interrupted long enough to give her his flight information and hang up, not wanting to get her hopes up before he was sure, but maybe he could help April after all.

* * *

**_So a few more chaps to go, they should be up within the next few days. _**


	15. Not Looking For, Found a Fight

_**I'm going to post the last four chaps one right after another because it's taken me so long just to get this fic up. Plus I'm afriad if I don't do it right now, while I'm concious (pnemonia has this weird way of making you fall asleep when you don't intend to...) it won't get done. So anyway, thanks to all the reviewers and everyone who took the time to read this, it means a lot. **_

---

**He held us for like five minutes each when he got off the phone and he smiled the way he always does…like it makes him happy to be happy.**

**But even I can see that it's been a long time since he smiled that way, or slept even. And I recognize that look in his eyes. The look my dad always wore.**

---

Booth leaned against the counter with a beer, watching Brennan because she'd insisted on doing the dishes by herself, citing his 'need to rest' as a valid reason.

April had disappeared to her room for a few minutes and he seized the moment of privacy. Setting aside his beer, he took a step closer to Brennan and lowered his voice.

"Joey used to send me letters." He began, immediately catching Brennan's attention. She stopped washing the dishes and turned toward him, all blue-eyed concentration. "Usually on his own letterhead with the Army emblem, but once it came on letterhead from a bank in Maryland. You mentioned your father and it got me thinking…"

Brennan frowned, thoughtfully tapping her fingers on the countertop, following his train of thought as usual.

"Safety deposit box."

Booth nodded. "Turns out Joey had a safety deposit box opened three weeks before he died."

"Was there anything in it? Anything for her?" She asked urgently. Booth was about to respond when April entered the room.

"Hey guys, I'm going for a run, be back in a few." April had her hair pulled back in a ponytail, small blue shorts and a long sleeve black shirt, her thumbs poking through the cuffs to keep them down. She gave a half smile as she awkwardly hopped around on one foot, trying to balance and tie her shoe.

"That's fine April, take your phone." Brennan said, giving Booth a pointed 'I'll explain later' look. April nodded and left.

---

**I went from not wanting to sweat, to going out of my way to sweat in a matter of weeks. WTF?**

---

"What? Run? April doesn't run. Hell, she doesn't walk fast if she can help it." Booth frowned at Brennan, retrieving his beer from the counter. Brennan merely nodded.

"Dr. Wyatt suggested she try it as an alternative to cutting. He postulated that her overwhelming feelings might be easier to handle if she had some physical activity and time on her own to relax." She shrugged. "Sounds like a whole lot of psychosocial crap to me…but it seems to be helping." She returned to the dishes while Booth's gaze remained fixed on the door.

"Well," he said with a sigh, "I guess if it's working. She's doing a lot better with Gordon Gordon now, huh? When I left she wouldn't even talk to him."

"Yes, they had one meeting where she inexplicably started talking to him about her father and, as far as I know she's been relatively open with him ever since." As she reached down to put away a baking sheet, she hissed and sprang back up, gripping her side in pain.

"What is it?" Booth asked, immediately pulling her over to lift her shirt.

"Oh, April and I got a little rough during our workout today." She glanced absently at her side where a wayward kick had left her with an ugly purple bruise. She looked up as she pulled down her shirt and had to laugh at Booth's horrified expression.

"Booth, I'm fine. Really. It was my fault, I was spotting her and didn't watch where her feet were going."

"What the hell happened here Bones? First she's jogging and now karate?"

"Well, technically it was karate first, then jogging." This comment didn't help, she realized.

"Bones, I don't like this."

"I know, Booth, But April has issues with self-esteem…"

"Which is completely understandable but I don't see how..."

"It's also completely unacceptable. She's capable of so much Booth, and I wanted her to know that. Learning martial arts is largely about self-esteem, it's about skill and training and focus and, it's helping. If she feels she can defend herself, she's more likely to try." She stepped closer, trying to make him understand.

Booth still frowned but she could tell he wasn't as closed off to the idea as before.

"The things I'm teaching her are helping her to realize her own skills and abilities. She's learning to trust and rely on herself. I know you want to protect her forever Booth, but she's going to have to learn to do that for herself one day." She said quietly, sliding her hands around his waist, waiting hopefully for his reply.

Booth closed his eyes and took a deep breath before slowly wrapping his arms around her shoulders. "Okay Bones. If you really think it's helping, keep doing it. Anything is better than nothing. "

"My thoughts exactly." She smiled and stood up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips. Instantly both were reminded of how long it had been since they'd been near one another. And how long it had been since their hunger for each other's scent and taste had been satisfied.

"How long do these jogs usually last?" Booth asked as trailed hot kisses across her jaw and down her neck.

"A half an hour or so." Brennan answered breathlessly, her head tipped back, eyes closed.

"We'll have to be quick." He muttered, his own eyes closed as he felt for the clasp of her bra through her shirt.

Brennan nodded, her mouth was dry and she diverted all her available attention to undoing the buttons on his shirt.

"It won't be a problem for me if it's not a problem for you." She assured him.

With matching devilish smiles, they raced off to the bedroom.

---

**I didn't come here on purpose, so I can't really be held responsible for what happened once I was here…right?**

---

April didn't stop running until her lungs burned and her legs felt weak beneath her. While she'd originally found Dr. Wyatt's suggestion of 'therapeutic physical exertion', frankly, a load of crap, she'd found the good doctor's recommendation quite effective. When she ran, it was like a cleansing for her mind, she couldn't think or feel anything except the air the pounding pavement. It had a somewhat filtering effect, like the worries of the day were gone for a while. And the overwhelming feelings that used to suffocate her didn't seem so oppressive anymore. Her scars were beginning to fade, both outside and in.

That's why it was so terribly inconvenient that she stopped where she did, and that he was there.

Hands on her knees, she closed her eyes to catch her breath and it took a moment before April realized how far she'd run. Taking her first look around, she saw it was not only past sundown, she'd run nearly two miles from the apartment. April found herself at a small neighborhood arcade, one which she usually avoided like the plague because of the droves of kids from her school who frequented it.

Intending to set on her way back to the apartment, neither Brennan nor Booth would be too happy to know how far she'd wandered, April leaned up against a streetlight and started into a quick quad stretch to avoid pulling a muscle.

She was so lost in aimless thought, that she didn't hear the tell tale dinging of the arcade door opening, signaling someone's exit.

"Why if it isn't Little Miss April Ross."

The voice cut through the cool evening air and struck her ears like a nine pound hammer. Immediately the hair on the back of her neck stood on end and she froze in place. She was facing away from the door but she could hear footsteps approaching, echoing off the empty street.

"Don't pretend you can't hear me April, I know you can."

The voice was right by her ear now, warm breath brushing against her neck and she shuddered, but still couldn't find the strength to move.

Eyes shut tight, she gripped the streetlight as she spoke. "Leave me alone Pierce, I've already met my Creep Quota for the day."

"Then you must be dying for a little one on one time with me then, huh?" She felt a strong hand gripped her right arm and spun her around to face him. April bit her lip to keep in a surprised yelp and she bravely opened her eyes, looking her attacker in the face. The vice grip still on her arm, Pierce raised the other and pushed her smooth black hair behind her ear. "That's better. Let me see that face of yours, April. Those lips."

"Don't call me April." She spat through her teeth. She was surprised how easily the bravado claimed her, while inside she could hardly breathe.

"And why not, April?" Pierce, a tall, strong baseball player with crew cut blonde hair and expensive jeans, leaned in close, his long nose trailing along her jaw. April stood stiffly, her back against the streetlight, unable to move. She could see three or four boys standing nearby in the shadows, Pierce's ever-present entourage no doubt.

"Because you're a dick and I don't want my name in your mouth." She knew it was the wrong thing to say, the first thing that occurred to her usually was. And that was usually exactly what she said.

Almost immediately the grip he'd had on her arm tightened and the hand that had been fiddling with her hair took a fistful and yanked down. This time she couldn't hold in her whimper.

"Well I don't know about my mouth, but I know where I want your mouth." His words were harsh, no longer dripping with false gentility as before. "It's not nice to call names April, I don't appreciate it." He yanked once more on her hair and firmly pushed his knee between her trembling legs. "Now say it."

"No." She all but whispered, tears squeezing out the corners of her eyes as the pain in her skull intensified. He pushed harder against her and she could feel herself retreating, trying to get to that place where it didn't matter what he did to her, the only place where she was truly safe. But as it was the last time with Roger, she found the safe place inside her mind was elusive and she was hopelessly, entirely stuck here. In this moment, with Pierce.

"Say it." He commanded. "I'm nothing Pierce. Without you I'm nothing. Say it!"

The words were on her tongue, she just wanted this to end. She wanted him to be done humiliating her, done hurting her, and she knew all she had to do was say the words he wanted to hear…but they wouldn't come.

_No one has the right to make you feel powerless April. No one._

---

**She's in my head…I can hear Brennan's voice in my head.**

**I've never been so happy to question my sanity.**

---

"Fuck you, Peirce."

The boy was momentarily stunned by the sudden strength in April's voice and he loosened his grip for a moment.

_Don't hesitate. If you get an opportunity, take it._

April felt the tension on her scalp let up and immediately jumped into action. Bringing her right arm up, she swung it down across her body, knocking away Peirce's hand and freeing herself fully. Then, taking hold of the arm she'd just knocked free, she pulled it over her head, swinging it around behind him 'police arrest' style and pressed him up against a nearby car, wrenching his elbow up and back. The cry of pain that escaped his perverted lips almost made her smile.

"I said 'leave me alone', and I meant it." Releasing him, she took a step back, waiting for his next move, just like she'd been taught.

_Don't go looking for an attack, but if it comes to you, be ready._

"You Bitch." Pierce pushed off the car and charged at her, fists flying in blind rage.

_Keep calm, emotions cloud your judgment. Focus on what needs to be done to subdue your opponent._

April ducked the first swing that was within range and turned to face him. While he was still off balance, she planted a swift kick in his back Pierce was on the ground, blood oozing from his lip and hands.

_Never kick a man when he's down._

April stood and watched breathlessly as Pierce's buddy's helped him up. Her legs were still shaking, but now with adrenalin and blood that raced through her veins. Pierce groaned, slightly dazed from his fall, but when his eyes locked with Aprils' they cleared and he scowled deeply.

"This isn't over."

_There's nothing wrong with a little mental intimidation._

"Oh, I think it is." She responded darkly, "Because if you ever come after me again, I'm not going to be the one dealing with you. I'll leave that to my ex-sniper uncle. I'm sure he'd love to meet you."

Then, with one last look over her shoulder, she turned and headed off into the darkness, back the way she'd come.

---

**I've never felt this way before. It's like I'm…invincible. I think…I like it.**

**I hope that deush trips and falls off a cliff.**

---

**_Three mor to go!_**


	16. Loose Ends

---

**Being sore never felt this good before.**

---

April drug herself up the last flight of stairs to Booth's apartment, sure she'd never been so tired before, at least, never when she had been on the winning side of a beating. Of course, that was a new experience in and of itself.

She winced slightly as she pushed through the door. The stinging pain in her head had gone down but now that the adrenalin had worn off, there was a throbbing in her right forearm where she was sure she'd have a bruise.

Brennan and Booth came around the corner from the hallway when they heard the door open, Booth discreetly zipping his pants as Brennan hastily buttoned her blouse, not that April noticed either of their guilty expressions.

"Bug it's been almost an hour where have you been?" Booth asked as benignly as possible, trying not to sound overprotective.

April took a deep breath and gave a small smile. Booth frowned, glancing at Brennan, he stepped forward, cupping her cheeks gently.

"April, why are you crying?"

Blinking, April reached up to touch her eyes. Sure enough, warm, salty tears wet her trembling fingers.

Booth watched her green eyes follow in fascination as the wet droplets rolled down her fingers and it only served to concern him more. Taking the girl by the shoulders, he tried once again to get a straight answer from her.

"April, where were you?"

April looked at him as if seeing him for the first time, and then looked over his shoulder at Brennan, who was studying her intently.

"I beat a guy up."

---

**I learned two things today. One, I can kick some major ass when I want to. And, two, it's best to ease Seeley into stories about my ass-kicking abilities.**

---

Booth's blood pressure was no-where near normal, in fact, it wasn't even in the same hemisphere as normal. He couldn't have sat still if he wanted to, but he didn't really want to. April had gone to take a shower after finishing her story, and all Booth could think was that he needed a stiff drink and to have a talk with Zach about his tutoring April so she would not have an excuse to ever leave the house again.

He looked up from the floor he'd been watching move back and forth under his feet when he heard the bedroom door open and Brennan slipped through.

She handed him a glass of single malt with ice and crossed her arms.

"I stopped in to see the bruise on her arm, make sure she didn't hurt herself." She said, crossing her arms and watching him. She thought he'd done surprisingly well that evening, considering he'd just gotten back from an undoubtedly tough undercover assignment only to find his sixteen-year-old 'niece' had taken up jogging and karate.

"She thinks you're mad at her."

He gave her a look over the rim of the glass and swallowed. "Well, she'd be wrong."

"Yes, I told her that but…"

"I'm mad at _you_."

"Me?! Wait, what did I do?"

"Lets start with not telling me that there was a boy at her school that was harassing, abusing and generally being a jackass to her."

"Booth I called the school and you can trust that they have had the fear of God put in them"

"You don't believe in God." He said, mostly to be argumentative.

She rolled her eyes "The fear of you and me then. Besides, it's not like I could easily reach you, you were undercover, remember." Brennan huffed, jerkily pulling her clothes off to change into pajamas.

"Yeah, I won't be doing that anymore." He muttered, facing the other direction and finishing his drink.

"That's not rational, you have to do what Cullen asks of you."

Ignoring this comment, he continued hotly, "How about these little Jackie Chan lessons you've been participating in, I don't remember hearing anything about those."

Brennan pursed her lips, she didn't really have a response to that, she had been intentionally vague about the martial arts with him, unsure of how he'd react.

"And then she goes off to find this guy and…"

"She didn't intend to find him, she was running and ended up there, she didn't realize where she was going." Brennan defended lamely.

"Yeah, we're getting a treadmill."

"I think that defeats the purpose."

"Why? Running is running." Booth stopped pacing and took up a spot near the open window, trying to relax. It seemed like he'd been tense for days. Months even. It was true actually. It just went from determined, watch-your-back tension, to a fatherly worry tension.

Booth had his back to her, but she could see him clenching his jaw, but for some reason some of the fire was gone from his next words.

"Bones I just…I'm glad you took an interest and I'm not sorry you did what you did. But, I need to know what's going on. Especially something like this guy Pierce. He could have really hurt her." He turned around, hoping she would understand

Brennan frowned, realizing it wasn't so much that Booth was angry, but that he was worried. Meeting his eyes, she bit her lip and slowly crossed the room to him.

"April can take care of herself now Booth." She said carefully, watching him for a reaction to see if that was the right thing to say.

Booth took a deep breath and hung his head and then turned slightly to look at her. "I see that. I just…I kind of wish she didn't have to, you know? She didn't get to have a childhood. I wanted to give some of that back to her now. To protect her for a while."

Brennan looked away. "I'm sorry if I took that from you Booth. I was trying to help."

Booth studied the night sky for a moment, and then reached over and grasped Brennan's arm as she started to turn away.

"No Bones," He said quietly, pulling her against him, "I'm glad you did what you did. I know it's what she needs. She's not a little kid anymore, I just…it's going to take some getting used to." He kissed the top of her hair and gave her a little squeeze. "You did good, Bones."

Brennan smiled into his chest, enjoying his warm embrace for a few moments in thoughtful silence. "She still needs you, you know." His only response was another kiss on her temple, so she contented herself with his embrace for a while before looking up at him. "How'd the assignment go?"

Booth stiffened slightly and he quickly masked a flicker of sadness that crossed is face. "We lost a man. A guy who'd been deep cover for several months, he was hit in a firefight a few weeks into the assignment." He sighed and she pulled him back toward her as he rested his chin on her shoulder. "But we got the bad guys so…"

Brennan nodded, wishing to lead him to bed and get him to try and sleep, though she knew it wouldn't come easily that night. But her eyes fell on the white envelope on the bed and she pulled away.

"You should go see April. She'll want that."

Booth followed her gaze and nodded. "Yeah. I hope it's what she needs." He gave her a tired smile and moved out of the room.

---

**I'm so lucky to have people like them. People who go out of their way to care about me. The kind of people my dad would have wanted me to be loved by.**

---

A soft knock at the door went unheard by April as she stood on a stepladder in her room, headphones from her ipod planted firmly in her ears. Her pajama top was wet from her freshly washed hair and her bottoms were being splattered with varying shades of blue as the plate with her paints on it tipped, she was concentrating on a particularly frustrating piece of her mural on the ceiling and not paying attention to it.

Booth stood in the doorway, momentarily marveling at the art gallery April's room had become. When he'd left she'd stopped painting for a while and the colors were mere swirls and splashes covering parts of two joined walls and a ceiling. Now, though, all four walls and ceiling were covered in a Monet-esque multicolored mural of what he could now see were faces. Incredibly expressive, unrealistically colored portraits of himself, one Tommy Hopkins, Brennan, Parker, Angela and even Zack and Hodgins. He saw the part she was working on would be his favorite, a self-portrait of April done in orange and green, laughing out loud the way she rarely did. So rarely, that if she did he always felt the urge to bottle up the sound so he would have it there to carry him through the darker days to come.

April, bopping to a guilty pleasure of The Hanson Brothers, turned to clean her brush in a jar on her dresser, and caught sight of Seeley in the doorway. Hastily, she put down her paints and pulled the headphones from her ears.

"Sorry, I didn't see you there." She muttered, pulling some wrinkly plastic wrap over the paints and wiping her hands on an old dish towel.

Coming to stand in front of him, she looked up into his face bravely. "So, are you…mad at me?"

The question startled him. A moment ago she'd seemed flustered and nervous, now, that disturbingly calm voice was back and she was motionless again.

She really reminded him of her father sometimes.

"No, I'm not mad at you angel-face." He said gently, returning the smile she showed at hearing this.

"You like?" She asked, gesturing around her room as the silence turned awkward.

Booth nodded, grinning now as he openly studied her mural. "It's amazing. I can't believe how fast you finished it."

April grinned and flipped down on her bed. "Yeah, well, when inspiration strikes, you just gotta roll with it." She shrugged.

Booth nodded. "Bones says that too."

"Really?" April scrunched up her face, that didn't sound like a really Brennan-like thing to say.

"Well…not in so many words. What she actually says is 'the creative elements and the scientific pieces of her latest novel have finally started coming together so she doesn't have any time to eat', but, I get what she's not saying."

"Ahh…" April humored him, rolling her eyes playfully. She noticed him fidgeting with something in is hands and leaned forward curiously. "What's that?"

"Oh this?" Booth looked at the envelope as if he'd forgotten he had it. "This, um, is for you."

April eyed the envelope suspiciously before hesitantly taking it. Her eyes widened upon the writing on it and she looked back up at Booth, her mouth open with questions but she seemed to have lost her voice.

Booth expected the shock on her face and explained quickly. "You're father opened a safety deposit box shortly before he died. I recently found it and…well, he left that for you in it, along with this."

April looked up from the envelope in her hands to see Booth pull what looked like a necklace from his pocket.

He squatted before her folded up form on the bed and took her hand, placing the necklace with the antique, ornate round pendent, in the middle of her palm.

"What is it?" She whispered, teary eyed and suddenly very warm.

Booth smiled softly and shook his head. "I don't know. But you're dad had a way of making sure everyone knew exactly what they needed to know." He tapped the letter. "Let your dad talk to you, Little Bug."

He stood, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I love you April." Then, as quietly as possible, he left the room.

April watched him walk away and shut the door behind him and took several deep breaths before turning her eyes on the thick, yellowish-white envelope in her lap. Tears slowly ran down her cheeks as she clutched the necklace in one hand and traced the letters of her name in her father's unmistakable scrawl across the front.

The letter was sealed, it hadn't been opened since the day her father had closed it up all those years ago. Would she finally get the answers she wanted? Did she want to? What would he say?

Suddenly the thick, aged envelope felt too heavy in her hands and the air in her room too thick for her lungs. She leapt off the bed and moved to the open window, taking large gulps of air that tasted salty from the tears running over her lips.

---

**A letter. From my father. This doesn't even seem possible. I…it's just...Oh God, I think I'm going to throw up. I never expected to hear from my father ever again, now I have this letter and I should be ecstatic. Instead I'm petrified…of what it will say, of what it won't. Of all the questions I'm so desperate to have answers for. I never really knew my father. I'm not ready for this. And I've never been more ready.**

**I am going to throw up.**

---

But she didn't. She closed her eyes, gathered her newly discovered strength and took a deep, cleansing breath. When she felt her heartbeat return to normal, she turned slowly and faced the envelope that had fallen to the floor in her haste to get off the bed.

After only a moment's hesitation she went to her top dresser drawer, pulled out a small black box and removed a razor blade. Then, retrieving the envelope, she settled on her bed, carefully sliced it open and began to read.

_**Curious? Me to, keep going, thers more!!**_


	17. Tied up

_Dear April,_

_If you're reading this, I guess that means I wasn't able to talk myself out of it this time. For that, I am truly sorry. I'm not going to give you a long drawn out explanation about why I did it baby, because you deserve better than that and it doesn't matter anyway. I'm not there and nothing can excuse that, I've failed you in that regard and I'm sorry. But, I refuse to dwell on it. Instead, I'm going to tell you some things that you must know before another day passes._

_First and foremost, I love you April. I know I didn't say it enough, hell, I don't know if I ever said it, but you need to know it's true. You've been the light in my world since you were born, and you're what's kept me going these last few weeks since we lost your mother. I wish I could say I'll always be there, but I can't. I could never bring myself to lie to you baby and make you think life was easier than it is. Life is hard, but you're strong and I know you'll survive. In fact, you'll do better than survive, you'll live. April, I want you to listen carefully, none of this is your fault. I don't want you to think for a moment that I did this because you simply weren't enough for me. Nothing could be further from the truth. The problem lies with me, I'm the one who's not strong enough to carry on anymore. You didn't do anything wrong, know that and know I love you. Those two things you must never forget April, promise me._

_I wanted to say I'm sorry if I was distant, or ever seemed cold to you. Emotion hasn't been an easy thing for me for a long time, some wounds just never heal I suppose. But I wouldn't change any of the decisions I ever made, even and especially the ones that cost me dearly. I made each one knowing the risk I took and the possible outcome. I was protecting my country, answering the call of duty and I won't apologize for that. But I do apologize if the effects these decisions had on me ever caused you pain. That was never my intention, baby._

_I have a picture of you on my desk. You're about eight years old. You were blowing bubbles in the front yard before you recruited your mother for a piggy-back ride, you know the one. Your hair is falling out of those meticulous braids your mother so loved to put you in and you have on that pink top and bare feet as always. You're both laughing. No matter what, that's how I'll always think of you April. Eight years old and happy in that carefree way only children can be._

_Someday you'll grow up and you'll be a woman and you'll be damn good at it, just like you are at everything else. I hope you never stop laughing out loud when everyone else smiles quietly. I hope you always dance when you do the dishes, and sing along with the radio in the car. I hope you never stop doing your art because some dreams aren't meant to be forgotten, you're a very talented girl. Never stop rolling your eyes when you think no one's looking, and remember to say 'please' and 'thank you'. Do your homework, get enough sleep every night and never let anyone tell you that you are anything less than amazing, because that's what you are, April. You outshine the sun._

_One more thing, someday you'll meet a boy and you'll think you're in love. Right now, the very prospect seems absurd I'm sure, and it makes me feel lightheaded just to think about, but I'm not naive and I know it will happen. So, this is how you'll know if he's the one…let your Uncle Seeley meet him. I'm serious about this. After he's recovered from the heart attack you'll give him by even mentioning boys (you know how he gets) ask him what he thinks of this boy. There is no better judge of people than your Uncle Seeley and I trust him implicitly. They say 'love is blind' for a reason baby, trust Seeley. He loves you almost as much as I do and he'll guide you in the right direction._

_With this letter you should find a necklace. It's a locket April. I had it made special for your mother before I left to go overseas. She wanted to give it to you herself on your sixteenth birthday, but unfortunately, that isn't going to happen. On one side you'll find the only picture of your mother and I on our wedding day, the other side will hold the 50cent piece I gave you if you snap it into place. Hold these things close to your heart baby, and never forget how beautiful your mother was, and how she looked just like you._

_I am truly sorry that you're reading this April and you have every right to hate me for writing all this down instead of telling you in person. But I hope you won't. Never forget all you are and all you come from._

_All my love,_

_Major General Joseph Ross (Dad)_

April read the letter through at least five times. The last two or three she actually made it through the whole thing without stopping to breathe through sobs or clear her eyes of hot, salty tears.

Hours passed and she turned out her light, but lay in bed wide-awake, staring at the night sky outside her window. She wondered if maybe her father was up there somewhere looking down at her, and she wondered why it took him so long to talk to her.

Round about two am she saw a faint light filter under the crack in her door and, not having anything better to do since sleep obviously wasn't going to happen, she slipped from her bed and padded over to the door to investigate.

The light was coming from the kitchen and the unmistakable shadow of Seeley Booth moved slowly across the wall.

Booth had slept fitfully for a few hours, then spent an hour wide-awake, staring at the ceiling, trying to get back to sleep. When that didn't work he got out of bed, carefully so as not to wake the woman sleeping beside him, and went to the kitchen with every intention of getting some warm milk, but for some reason that is not what found it's way into his hand.

"I've never heard of the 'cold beer at 3am' sleep remedy."

Booth almost choked on his swallow and bent forward in an attempt not to do so. With a cough, he looked over at April in the doorway.

"What are you doing awake?" He asked, trying to fool himself into thinking he hadn't been startled, or at the very least, hadn't been scared.

"Same question." April retorted, settling at the table casually. Booth raised his eyebrows but didn't respond. Instead he reached into the refrigerator and pulled out a squeeze bottle of kool-aid and set it in front of his young companion before taking a seat beside her.

"What, no warm milk?" Then, as an afterthought, she added, "Thank you."

Booth only nodded, immediately lost in thought and April soon followed suit. They had both long finished their respective drinks and been sitting in the dim kitchen for nearly half an hour before speaking again.

"Do you like Tommy?"

Booth glanced to his right, April stared up at him openly, her dark hair pushed behind her ears and showing pale face. The question seemed a bit out of left field so he took a moment to think.

"He's a good guy. Good for you, I mean. I guess so, why do you ask?"

A small smile flickered across her face, but April only shrugged. "Just wondering."

Booth frowned slightly, but decided not to pursue it and absently tapped a finger against his empty beer bottle. He really did need to talk to Cullen about these assignments, going from one life to another, trading identities like this, it wasn't something that was ever easy to do, but now he had a family to think about. Going undercover at the drop of a hat just couldn't be a part of the playbook anymore.

Again, April's voice startled him out of his thoughts.

"What?"

April hesitated and then asked her question again. "I said, do I roll my eyes when I think no one is looking. Have you ever noticed…?" She seemed almost nervous, shy about asking such a thing.

"Yes. All the time." A half grin and narrowed eyes confirmed his answer and a pleased smile took hold of April's lips.

"Good." She whispered.

Booth watched her squish the plastic bottle between her hands, staring off into space without really seeing, and he wondered what was going on in that complicated head of hers. He leaned forward, putting his elbows on the table and picked up a fake apple sitting in a bowl at his fingertips.

"Why all the questions?"

April looked over at him as if she'd forgotten his broad, strong frame was seated beside her, but he didn't turn to face her.

"The letter. Dad's letter." She cleared her throat and fidgeted in her chair, staring at the table and wishing it were just a little bit darker in the small dining room. Talking was easier in the dark. "He said that if I ever met a boy and I, um, I thought he was…well, anyway, I should let you meet him. He said he trusted your judge of people above all others, so I was just…wondering."

Booth 'hmm'ed and nodded, not wishing to push her harder than she could handle. "And the rolling your eyes, thing?"

"He said I should never stop doing that."

Identical sad smiles slid across their lips as they shared the quiet for a few more minutes.

"He said I outshine the sun." Her whisper paused Booth nervous movements. He stopped spinning the apple in his hands and he looked over, but April was studying her fingers. "That's poetic. For dad especially…he never said stuff like that."

"You always brought out the poet in him." Booth said quietly, causing April's deep green eyes to snap up to his and hold him in a penetrating gaze that suddenly turned vulnerable.

"You think?" She asked timidly.

"Definitely."

Again they shared a smile and returned to a comfortable silence, bodies sluggish with exhaustion while the wheels in their brains just kept turning overtime.

"I could never understand why you and he were friends." April said nonchalantly after they'd decided to move their early morning ponderings to the more comfortable seats on the couch.

"Why's that?"

April shrugged one shoulder and pulled at a loose string on her shirt. "I guess because you wear always so…funny and life-full. And Dad was always the opposite. Sort of regal and…uniform. Military. You just seemed like such opposites." Booth's arm draped across the back of the couch and he squeezed her shoulder, she smiled breifly at him before turning away.

"And now?"

She sighed. "And now, well, in his letter, I guess I saw some of the…fun in him that I always saw in you. And now, right now," She looked up into his face, "I see the shadows in your eyes that I always saw in his."

Booth frowned, he could see the question in her eyes, the one she wasn't asking and he took a deep breath. "April, your dad and I, we knew what we were getting into. The Army, the FBI for me later on, we knew exactly what we were doing, the risks and the consequences."

"Then why'd you do it?" April asked, her eyes growing moist and her voice suddenly quiet with desperation, "Why'd you join the army and the FBI if you knew how hard it would be? How much it would hurt?" Her eyes searched frantically for the answer in his, because in the end, that was what she blamed for losing her father. The pain that was just too much for him to take.

Booth sighed and swallowed hard, reluctantly preparing himself to answer.

"For you, April." He continued quickly, almost in a rush. "For Parker. You're dad and I grew up in a bad neighborhood in Philly. We saw things and did things…we wanted to make this a better, safer world. At first it was for us, then for our friends, but in the end it came down to you and, later, Parker. We did what we had to do April, to make this world a better place for you." He looked over and saw April's chin trembling as she fought for her rapidly disappearing control.

With a brave breath she nodded and looked down at her lap. "I see that. I can get that." She nodded, as if trying to convince him. "But…But I…just think that maybe…" Her voice grew tight and warm tears fell from her nose, onto her hands and she enclosed them in tight fists. "Maybe this world would have been a better place for me…if he were in it."

Booth nodded and reached for her, his own tears going unnoticed as he pulled her into his lap and cradled her small body against him.

"Me too, angel-face." He kissed her forehead, "Me too."

**--- **

Part of me hates him for leaving the way he did, just giving up that way. Part of me can't stand the fact that he thought it would be okay to write me a letter and tell me all the things I needed to hear from him. Part of me wants can't believe he sighned his official name and added 'Dad' in parenthesis like it was an afterthought. But, only part of me.

The other part reads that last line, the 'all my love' part. And the part that almost dies with joy at seeing those words convinces all the other angry, hurt parts that it's all okay. Because my dad loved me and he did the best he could. That's all anyone can really ask of anybody, right? So I'll just sit here and enjoy the safety of Seeley's arms for a while, and I'll take solice in the fact that I still have him and I'll let me battle myself for awhile, because it's all going to be okay.

--- 

_**One last chap. Oh, don't cry. If you cry, the I'll cry and we'll just be crying and cryng...**_


	18. Time Marches On

_**Well, the Angst Train has officially ended people. Thanks again for all your support and, if I liv through this cold/flu/demons-playing-inmy-lungs-and-brain thing...there will be more fics to come, so see you soon!**_

---**A Year and a Half Later**---

April stood and held her champagne glass full of sparkling grape juice high as she scanned the restaurant full of people. Her heart was nearly beating out of her chest, she was not a public speaker by any stretch of the imagination. But this was an important day, and she had important things to say.

"I know it's traditional for only the Bridesmaid and the Best Man to give a speech, but since just about everything having to do with this wedding has been untraditional, I hope you won't mind if I say a word or two."

Untraditional indeed. The bride wore red, 'the color of passion' she said. So to match the bridesmaids wore black evening gowns with red sashes, the groomsmen's' wore red on red shirts and ties, while the groom wore white on red.

The bride refused to be married in a church, insisting her groom would have to settle for God's "creation" instead of God's "house" but kept her opinions on the absurdity of God having either 'creation' or a 'house' to herself, much to the delight of the groom. The attendance at the small gathering had been small, and now the brides' family, grooms' family and all their close friends were gathered into their favorite, untraditional restaurant, where no one knew what they were going to eat until the owner brought it to them.

A few nods and smiles encouraged her to continue so April turned to her left, where the bride and groom sat.

"Well, all of you look up here and you see a daughter, a son. A loving father, a brilliant doctor, a brother, a little sister, a good friend, an anthropologist, a federal agent, a war veteran, the best investigative team in the country." April glanced around quickly as she spoke. Booth's family sat at a table nearby, the squints were seated to her right. Russ and Max stood near the wall beer in hand, smiling warmly.

She took a deep breath and continued slowly. "I look at them and I see all that, but I also see two people, who give freely, who love wholly and who never give up, on anything…or, anyone." Tears gathered in her eyes, but she continued without a single waver in her voice. "I see the one woman in the world who could ever stand toe to toe with my unbelievably stubborn Uncle Seeley and his Charm Smile. And I see the only man in the world who would ever stand a chance in convincing the equally stubborn Dr. Brennan to participate in this archaic institution of marriage." A few polite chuckles floated on the Jasmine scented air and the pair in question sported identical tiny eye-rolls.

"So please, join me in raising our glasses to congratulate two people we all love, Doctor Mrs. Temperance Brennan-Booth and Special Agent Mister Seeley Booth-Brennan." She ended with a smile and laughed when everyone erupted in cheers and glasses clinked all over the room.

---

**Well if he isn't just the cutest thing ever in that blue tux.**

---

"C'mon, one dance." April stuck out her bottom lip, executing a perfect, you-can-deny-me-nothing pout. Reluctantly, the man in question rose from his chair, all the while being poked and prodded by Angela and Hodgins.

"You have to promise not to let Booth shoot me." He said, in all seriousness.

"I promise Zach. He doesn't even have his gun on him…I checked." April said brightly, grasping Zach's hand and pulling him out onto the dance floor.

"But I don't know this dance." Zach complained, even as April arranged his hands appropriately, his left in her right, his right on her hip.

"Merengue Zach, it's easy, look," April began swishing her hips from side to side exaggeratedly, trying to show him the step, "all in the hips."

"That's what I'm afraid of." But he made an effort anyway, and once he stopped glancing around trying to locate Booth, he actually was quite good.

"Wow, I didn't know you had such great rhythm Dr. Addy."

Zach nodded. "It's really just a simple mathematical calculation in order to establish the pattern of the beat."

April threw her head back and laughed only a little bit louder than necessary. "Oh stop that." She smiled, slapping him in faux flirtation.

Zach eye'd her. "Have you been drinking the punch? Because I think Hodgins may have managed to get some pure alcohol in here and…"

"No Zach." April said through her teeth, a smile plastered on her face and holding his hands as she spun herself in his arms. "I'm trying to make someone jealous."

Zach frowned. "Who?"

"Her." Zach followed April's pointed gaze to a girl in a green dress with dark hair and eyes, staring at them from the other side of the dance floor.

"Who is she?"

Again April laughed and Zach waited until she was finished. "Her name is Gina and she thinks you're totally hot."

Zach's eyes widened. "Her?" He asked in almost disbelief. She was well-structured indeed.

"Uh-huh. But she's too shy to come over here and talk to you, so I figured I'd give her a little motivation."

"Are you sure she's not…" Zach was interrupted as a slender finger tapped April on the shoulder.

"Excuse me, could I cut in?"

April looked at Gina and then back at Zach. "Well, I don't know Zach and I were having such a good time and…"

Zach took his que as if motivated by a normal social awareness. "And I'm sure we'll get the opportunity to dance again sometime." Then, extending his hand to Gina, he smiled. "May I?"

April crossed her arms and watched them walk away with a satisfied grin on her face. A soft instrumental song began and her grin widened as Zach awkwardly stood there for a moment before Gina drew her arms up around his neck, pulling herself closer than the song actually required. Zack threw her an I'm-in-over-my-head look and April merely grinned, excitedly giving him the thumbs-up and a wink.

"Pleased with yourself?"

April nearly jumped out of her skin at the voice that was suddenly in her ear.

"Yes, actually. Zach needs a girl. You and Hodgins got one, shouldn't he?"

Booth glanced over at Zach and then back at April. "I suppose, though Bones would not be happy to hear you talking about women as if they were livestock." He teased and April rolled her eyes.

"Shall we?" He asked, extending his hand. April grinned and allowed him to lead her out onto the dance floor.

Booth smiled as he watched Russ lead his sister out onto the dance floor for a dance, the look she wore as she did so was enough to melt his heart.

"She is beautiful tonight, isn't she?" April asked, following Booth's rather obvious stare.

He nodded. "Gorgeous. I told her so, but she doesn't believe me."

"Well, just keep telling her that, she'll get it eventually."

"I hope so."

Booth began humming softly and playfully spun the girl in his arms just to see her smile.

"That was a beautiful speech you gave Bug."

April rolled her eyes. "Thank you, but Seeley, it's been over ten years, you think you could drop the Bug thing?"

He calmly shook his head. "Not a chance."

April heaved a dramatic sigh, but smile remained firmly on her lips.

"So what's on your mind?"

"What are you talking about?" April frowned up at her uncle, doing her best not to let the nervous show on her face.

Booth only raised his eyebrows. "April I've known you since you were born, you don't think I can tell when you've got something serious on that mind of yours? That's why I asked you to dance, it was the only way I could get you alone to talk."

"Aw, and here I thought it was because you were jealous of Zach." She said with a smile, twirling away from him and in again in her black pumps.

"Well, that too." He winked at her, "Now seriously, what's up?"

April sighed. "No Seeley. Tonight is about you and Seeley. You and Tempe. I'll talk to you when you get back from Jamaica."

This caught Booth's attention and he looked down into April's decidedly more serious face.

"No, I think you better tell me now April."

"Smile Seeley." April said through her teeth and fake smile. "We're at your wedding remember."

Well, he couldn't quite muster a smile, but he did manage for less concerned/somber.

April sighed and diverted her eyes. "The other day when Tommy and I went out, after he got back you know?"

Booth nodded, he remembered of course. Tommy Hopkins had just graduated from the Military Academy and showed up on Booth's doorstep in full formal attire, hat and all.

"Well he asked me something, and I answered him and I don't you to freak out, okay?" She asked, looking up at him with those huge, deep green eyes. Booth had to strain to hear her between the music and the people in the room, and the fact that April was back to her self-conscious muttering instead of self-confident teasing she'd been using before didn't help much.

"I'll try not to…what did he ask?" He narrowed his eyes slightly in suspicion, but was conscious of trying not to frown, though he couldn't have been more anxious about what she was about to say.

April's need for several deep breaths before speaking did not bode well for him.

"He, um, he asked me what I'm doing for the rest of my life." She felt Booth go rigid and took advantage of the moment to pull him off the dance floor to a spot a bit more quiet where she could talk easier.

"What did you say?" Booth forced his voice to remain calm, not wanting to scare her off before she had told him everything?

"I-I told him that I didn't know…but that I wanted him to be a part of it."

Booth closed his eyes, suppressing a sigh and raised his hand to his face, but April caught it, her eyes searching his frantically.

"Booth I know we're young. We know we have a lot going right now, with Tommy starting college and me graduating. We haven't set a date or anything, you know? It's just…it's there. Neither of us can imagine our lives without each other. To be honest it scares the shit out of me, the thought of him not being there. I love him, Seeley. I want to spend the rest of my life with him."

Booth clenched his jaw, but his stance softened a bit as he met the desperation in April's eyes. "April, you don't know what you want to do next month, next week for that matter. What makes you think he's what you want for the rest of your life?" He said quietly, wishing to reason with her more than argue.

"Because, Seeley, we've been through everything together. He's my best friend, he's a part of me. Besides he's good for me, you said so yourself." Taking a step close, April touched his arm and waited for him to meet her eyes once more. "Please, Seeley I want you to be okay with this. I need you to be." She whispered urgently.

Booth opened his mouth, but she answered his question before he could get it out.

"Because…" She paused, breathing, "Because, you are the closest thing I've had to a father…since my actual father. I love you Seeley and I would love for you to…walk me down the aisle, when the day comes."

The vulnerability and hope that emanated from her eyes like a spotlight to his soul would have made it impossible for him to deny her anything in that moment. And, incidentally, the shock of her request also choked him up with unexpected tears and all he could do was reach out and pull her close.

"I'd be honored, April." He whispered, voice thick with emotion as he crushed the small girl to him.

April smiled and then laughed with relief, hugging him back with all her strength.

Suddenly cheers and whoops broke out all over the room and Booth and April looked up to find that Brennan had just, undoubtedly begrudgingly, tossed the bouquet and was now searching for her new husband.

Booth looked back down at April.

"Go." She said immediately, "I'll see you when you get back."

Booth smiled, pressing a quick kiss to her forehead. "I love you."

"Me too." She said quickly, and just as quickly, he was off, pushing through the crowd to take the hand of the new Mrs. Brennan-Booth.

April stood near the corner and waved, laughing when Booth leaned in to whisper something in Brennan's ear, and her eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. Then he grinned, pointing to the corner and Brennan stared at April, a mixture of shock, horror and delight on her face as April proudly pointed to her newly ornamented left hand.

'Why?' Brennan mouthed to her, ignoring for the moment, her bridal party who was trying to push her out the door.

April smiled and pressed her hands to her heart, shrugging, as if to say she really had no choice in the matter. Brennan nodded knowingly and waved, her wedding present from Booth, her own set of keys to the SUV, securely clamped between her fingers.

Along with everyone else, April waved as the car sped off, wondering what Booth would do if he found out she'd promised to let Tommy stay over for the weekend. She decided it was a good idea he would be in another country, safer for everyone that way.

---

**I never saw this coming. I mean, who ever thought the screwed up little kid with no family and a thing for the color black, would one day grow up to be that girl. The one with the amazing boyfriend and people, quirky, eccentric, loyal, caring people all around her who love her? A girl who's father loved her and who, in a way, never really left her.**

**And who in their right mind would have ever thought that girl would be me? I laugh just thinking about it.**

**Ain't life grand?**

---

THE END


End file.
